Page 58 of Skating the Blue Line
“I’ve been looking for this,” I say, taking the shirt from her and sliding it on.
Memories from the last time I wore it try to sneak into my mind, but I stop them.
No need for me to think about eating sushi off Chloe’s body while I’m in a towel.
“I found it under the couch and figured I would give it to you whenever I saw you next,” she’s blushing again, which means that she might have worn it once or twice since then.
Something that I’m more than okay with.
I give her a smile.
When I’m half dressed, we stand in awkward silence, something that we haven’t experienced in the time that we have known each other. Chloe is pulling at her fingers and I’m the dumb fuck wearing a towel in the middle of her living room.
We have to talk, so might as well get on with it.
“Should we take a seat?” I ask, waving towards the couch, trying to break the awkwardness.
I get her a nod, and we both take a seat, more than a cushion between us.
“So,” I start
“So,” Chloe repeats, shifting in her seat.
“I’m guessing you made a decision.” It’s not a question, but a statement. If she hadn’t, I wouldn’t be sitting here waiting for her to say something
She gives me a nod.
“I did.”
I’ve been waiting for this moment. I’ve been waiting for her to say something for the last week, and now that she has made it, I don’t know if I should be relieved or nervous
I let out a sigh preparing myself for what I am about to ask.
“What did you decide?” I ask my question carefully, trying really hard not to say the wrong thing. I’ve never been in this type of situation before and I want to do it right.
I turn my body towards her.
She sits with her arms folded on her lap and her eyes looking anywhere but up. I want to reach over and make her look at me, but what she’s about to say is probably hard for her.
After a long minute she looks up, and I notice that she has tears in her eyes.
Every inch of me wants to know what type of tears they are.
Good? Bad? Angry tears? Tears of hate towards me for putting her in this position?
She looks at me for what feels like forever but it’s really only thirty seconds and takes a deep breath before answering my question.
“I-I decided to keep the baby,” she finally says, her shoulders sagging as if the weight off her shoulders has been taken away.
So many things run through my body and mind all at once. Two of the major things that I feel are excitement and uncertainty. Excitement over the fact that I’m going to be a dad, something that I didn’t know I was excited for, and uncertainty because I have no idea how the hell we’re going to do this.
“You’re going to keep the baby.” It’s a statement not a question.
I might have to repeat that sentence a few times for it to stick in my mind that in a few months there’s going to be a tiny life that is going to depend on me.
“I’m going to keep the baby,” Chloe says with a nod, wiping her tears away.
I take a few minutes to digest everything.
