Page 154 of Girls Will Be Girls
“Really,” I say.
“This is real? No competition?” He says warily.
“No more games.” I shake my head.
A hint of a smile creeps onto Otto’s face. “Okay.” He nods.
“Okay.” I echo him. “But if you try to fuck with me again, or you come anywhere near Louisa, I will ruin you.”
“That’s fair.” He nods.
“I really fucking mean it.”
“I really fucking believe you.”
We both laugh, just a little. Like normal brothers.
“We try?” He puts his hand out.
I hesitate for a second.
I know the hell Otto has put me through, the endless ways he’s tortured me, the ways he could still ruin me, but I’m tired.
I’msotired.
I’m sick of being on separate teams.
Sick of paddling against the current with no destination.
I want to rest, stop fighting it all.
I take his hand in mine. “We try.”
Otto smiles, an actual smile with genuine emotion behind his eyes.
He lets go and palms me on the shoulder. “Go get your girl then.”
I lightly punch him on the shoulder.
I’m not convinced this won’t blow up in my face at some point, but I’ve never felt better about a decision.
Actually, only once.
When I decided to go after the girl I soaked in coffee. That’s the best decision I ever made.
I run outside looking formygirl.
A handful of people walk past me on the busy city street as I stand in the middle of the sidewalk searching for her. I think I’ve missed her when a soft sniffling sound catches my ear.
I turn around, and behind the restaurant’s stairs, sitting on the ground, there she is. Hunched down, face in her hands, shoulders shaking.
“Hey, hey, hey.” I slide down next to her, wrapping her in my arms. “It’s okay, baby girl. I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry.” I kiss the top of her head. “I fucked up. Please let me fix it. Give me another chance, and I’ll make sure you never feel like this again. I’ll fix it.”
She stutters through her cries.
“I- I can’t.”
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