Page 107 of Choosing Jenny
Sarah was right about me. I used to be selfish and irresponsible. I never shied away from that part of myself. I thought it was fine to be that way, because I wasn’t hurting anyone by living my life for me. But I also wasn’t helping anyone, either. My life was simple back then. I just did what I wanted. Being carefree had been liberating. Now…
Life is more complicated than I had ever known. And the thought made me smile.
Being on Halla and Orhon had changed me. The carefree life was great in theory, but also kind of empty. Sure, it was liberating, but it only liberatedme. Now, I’ve freed hundreds. Now, I liked caring about other people.And if I can play a role in liberating Halla and Orhon from Justice Bateen, then all the suffering and hardships will have been worth it.
After that thought, I was filled with resolve. Like I was ready for whatever was ahead of me.
Suddenly, I was overcome by a vicious need for Mal and Tiger, the men who helped me to see there was more to life than just myself. I told Longshot to take the wheel, grabbed Tiger and Mal, and brought them to the captain’s quarters. After everything that had happened and before everything that was to come, I needed them, and they seemed to feel the same way.
Clothes were tossed in every direction, lips and tongues and black and pearl gray fingers were everywhere. When Mal finally thrust into my pussy, Tiger mounted him, too, driving him even deeper into me. My body was alive with theirs. The scent of them, the feel of them. Their sounds. I couldn’t get enough of my guys. I wanted nothing else in any world. Just them.
Tiger pulled Mal’s gray hair, making him arch into me. I stared into his indigo eyes, unable to look anywhere else. My heart raced along with my orgasm, and when my body clenched on Mal’s cock, his release shuddered through him at the same time. Tiger grunted, joining us on that blissful plane of ecstasy.
Afterward, as we remained on the bed in a tangle of limbs, my thoughts returned. I didn’t know what Yesanol would bring. I didn’t know how I would stomach what I was about to witness or who I might become in the aftermath. But I knew one thing with absolute clarity.
I wasn’t running anymore. This time, I was walking straight into the fire, daring Justice to try and break me.
I’d already survived worse. Now, I burned for something greater.
CHAPTER 35
Mal
Perhaps a union is not such a scary prospect.
It was the first thought I had as I woke from our tryst. I hadn’t dozed for long, but the length of my nap was apparently long enough to warm up to the idea of a union. Again.
If I was honest with myself, I had thought about uniting with Jenny and Tiger many times. I suspected Justice wanted them to witness Dembeck’s execution so their horror at my actions would drive a wedge between us. They had never seen me do my job. But I had faith in them, that they would not think I was a monster for it. They were everything to me. A part of my family. I needed them in ways I never believed possible.
Growing up in Justice’s court at the palace, it would have never occurred to me to be the sort of man who would have a family, much less a union. I had never let myself dream of sucha thing. My life was too grim for anyone to love me. Or so I believed. Tiger and Jenny had changed all that for me.
Helping the Illiapol ghosts and meeting with Pierce had made me pensive, and it was followed by a verifiably raw fucking from Tiger and Jenny, so I wanted to blame those details for my romantic musings now. But each time we had come to Halla, and Jenny was with her sister, I couldn’t deny a fraction of jealousy took root. To have a blood connection with someone was enviable. I’d never had that. My thoughts circled around my envy like a whirlpool in a stormy sea, making it feel bigger than it actually was.
We do not stop in a storm.
I smiled at my father’s words—the only thing I had left of him. If I were to stay with Tiger and Jenny, there could be children. Lots of them. They would have their mother’s heritage, as when Ladrian blood mixed with other species, the child took after their mother, and it would be so miraculous to raise a little human child with them. The product of our love. A bloodline I’d lived most of my life without.
I sighed at the thought and stared out the window.
Yesanol emerged on the landscape before us in the early morning light. It was so different from Ladrille. Their palace was a seventy-story tower, ringed by a village and a high wall around that. Outside the high wall, the city spread out for kilometers in every direction.
It was the oldest city on Orhon and I’d visited once in my teens, as part of a diplomatic contingent with Justice. He’d sneered at everything but his sister, who he had installed as the new governor. Back then, I’d still been enamored of Justice, so I sneered, too.
Yesanol was just a city, like most others, but bigger. The citizens weren’t ignorant monsters. They were just people. But Imaintained my teenaged scorn to keep Justice happy. That was all I’d cared about. To impress my adoptive father.
The memory turned my gut sour as we landed in the village next to the tower. Early dawn broke over the city, and the sunslight sparkled on the lines of diamonds in the shining tower palace.
Jenny glanced out the captain’s quarter’s window and gasped. “It’s so beautiful."
Tiger came up behind her, wrapped his arms around her waist, and placed a kiss on her neck. “Not as beautiful as you,” he said, his voice soft with affection.
I smiled what felt like the last smile of the day to come. My grim task threatened to ruin more than my day—it could destroy the rebellion’s effort if it didn’t go well.
Quietly, reluctantly, I said, “Let’s go.”
The three of us met up with Longshot, Discord and Surge, and together we went through the guards and their security checks to be taken to the temporary governor. I wasn’t sure who Thunder had named to take her place while she served on the council, but knowing her, it would be someone as cruel and iron fisted as herself.
We were escorted to the throne room, which was a kaleidoscope of wealth and disrepair. Diamonds encrusted every surface, casting fractured rainbows in every direction. But whatever beauty the room might have had was dulled by a distinct haze and the stench of yesanosh. Even the marble surfaces were tinged yellow from the acrid smoke.
