Page 44 of Mail-Order Bride Secret
Jonny squirmed to be free and trotted back to the kitchen. The sound of banging pots assured her he was happy playing in the cupboard. She touched Otis’s brow. Still hot. So hot. How could he survive this? She gasped as his body arched off the bed. He twitched and then lay still. Still as death. She pressed her hand to his chest.
“Wally!” It was a cry for help. For healing.
He knelt at the bed. “He’s still breathing.”
“He’s not getting any better.” She kept her voice low so as to not alarm Ivy, but Wally couldn’t possibly miss the agony carried in each word. She’d done everything she knew to do, and it wasn’t enough.
“Join me in praying for him,” Wally spoke calmly as he held out an inviting hand.
She shook her head. “God doesn’t hear me.”
“What do you mean?”
“He didn’t stop me from having Jonny on my own. Having to take care of him alone.” And so much more but she managed to clamp her lips together before she put it into words.
He leaned back on his heels to study her. “Why didn’t you go home to your parents?”
She lowered her gaze. Then anger fueled her response. Anger at her parents, her situation, Delroy, and God, yes God. “They wouldn’t have welcomed me.” Words as hot as coals from the stove burned over her lips.
“They didn’t approve of your husband?” He paused giving her a chance to explain further. “They didn’t condone your marriage?”
“I was never married.” There. She’d confessed. A partial confession but enough. Let him decide what he thought of her now. “I was sent away in disgrace. Sent to my aunt. I was supposed to give up Jonny, but I couldn’t. I wouldn’t. I am not ashamed of my son.”
He rose, pulled her to her feet, and enfolded her inhis strong, protective arms. “You did the right thing. The boy should not be put in an orphanage where he would never know a mother’s love.”
She melted to him. Rested her head against his shoulder. The weight of his hand on her back was like a blessing. Or was she simply making it to be what she wanted? She must have stiffened because the pressure of his hand increased.
“I am not condemning you any more than God would.”
But God does.Even though she didn’t say the words aloud, he must have sensed her argument.
“Remember how Jesus said, ‘Neither do I condemn thee’?”
Silently, she finished what the Bible said after those words.Go and sin no more.And every day Maddie lived a lie.
“Maddie, you are my wife. I accept you just as you are. You are exactly what I need and want.” He waited. “The past is past. Let’s leave it there.
His words flowed through her with healing power. She ached to believe them. An ache that drained her of every vestige of strength. Her knees wobbled.
“You’re about to cave in.” He eased her back to the chair, sat on the one beside her and took her hands, and bowed his head. “Lord, Father of love and mercy, I know You love us with unending love. You love Otis too. Please heal his little body. May he recovercompletely whole. We trust You, knowing that You love us.” His prayer ended without amen.
Whole? She could never be that. He turned back to tending Otis leaving her hands bare and icy. She concentrated on his movements as he continued working to cool the boy’s body. Dip rag into water. Squeeze water out. Spread cloth to some area of the hot little body. Back and forth in a constant movement.
She tipped sideways.
Wally sprang to his feet. “Come on. It’s time for you to get some sleep.” He lifted her in his arms and strode from the room.
She rested her head on his chest, inhaling his soothing scent. Cows. Grass. Leather. Soap.
He folded back the covers and lay her on the sheet. He removed her shoes and tucked the quilt around her.
She couldn’t keep her eyes open. Was already more than half asleep. But not so much that she wasn’t aware that he leaned over her and kissed her cheek.
“Sweet dreams, my wife.”
Wally's handscramped from the cold water that he soaked the cloths in as he continued to sponge Otis. The boy struggled to breath. He mumbled andgroaned but wasn’t conscious. How long must the boy suffer? What if God chose to answer his prayers other than they way he hoped?
He concentrated on his question and caring for Otis. But still his mind went back to Maddie’s confession. She had never been married. His first reaction was shock. Followed almost immediately by sorrow. Sorrowful stings from sharp arrows. To realize she’d been intimate with a man but had avoided intimacy with him was arrow number one. Aware of the shame and guilt she had been forced to endure—arrow number two. Thinking of her alone with Jonathan and how difficult those early days must have been—arrow number three. But the sharpest, deadliest arrow was number four. She hadn’t been honest with him. Hadn’t trusted him enough to tell him the truth. Had allowed him to believe a lie.
