Page 54 of Debts and Desires
“A song.”
“I figured. What’s it about?”
“Sandcastles,” I answered, my face growing red.
“Sandcastles?” He raised a brow.
“Yes. Like building one in an hourglass.” I swallowed and added, “And how everything is one shake away from being destroyed.”
“Sounds deep. Let me read it.” He reached forward for my notebook and I pulled away. “What’s the matter, Buttercup? You never shared your songs before?”
“No, I have.” I swallowed. I wasn’t going to mention that it had only ever been two; Mia and my ex. My ex was indifferentand gave baseless praise. But I knew he never really cared for it. And Mia always offered criticism and suggested changes, but they were never in the direction I was trying to go with the song. My parents had read some too, but I didn’t like thinking about the times they’d steal the book from my hands and scoff, telling me how horrible of a child I was.
These are horrible, Emogen. You really thinkthisis fame worthy?
“Why not me?” Carter asked.
“Because.”
“‘Cause why?”
“Just because, Carter.” He studied me for a long time, as if we were in some staring contest I didn’t remember signing up for.
“It’s about me, ain’t it?” he chuckled.
“No! I’m just stuck on a part!” He raised a brow, staring me down until I felt like squirming away from him. “Okay, so youmayhave influenced it.”
“See, if it’s about me, you should let me read it.”
“It isn’t…” Carter gave pouty lips. I rolled my eyes, trying to fight the smile tugging at my lips. I sighed, surrendering. “Fine. Here.” I handed him my notebook. “But this is all confidential.” He moved his head in agreement, laughing, as he took the tattered green notebook from me and stood, pacing as he read.
As soon as it was in his hands, I regretted it. What if he changed the words like Mia? Or was indifferent about it? Or thought they were horrible? The silence was eating at me.
“Well?”
“This is… really, really good, Em,” he looked up, pinning me with those perfect orange-ish brown eyes.
“Really?”
“Yeah, really,” he answered, as if my asking was crazy. He looked back down for a moment. “This is poetry. Better, actually. I’m guessing it’s about our deal?” I gave a sheepish nod. He smiled, big. “So you know, Ihadn’tplanned on keeping you here ‘til you die, like the song suggests. But now that I think about it…” he trailed, wiggling his brows. I shook my head, face blushing.
“So, you like it?”
“Yes, Em, I do.” He paused, reading over it again. “I really like this part, ‘time’s a cruel mistress, you’re her master’. But so you know, youareworth a lot more to me than you think.” I had to look away, his stare too intense. “What part you stuck on?”
“Oh, uh.” I got up and pointed to the section. He nodded and went back to pacing as he read it over again. I bit my lip with anticipation. Did Carter have a background in music? He stopped pacing and leaned against his desk, crossing his legs at the ankles. Him being lost in concentration was something I found seriously hot. His jaw clenched a few times as his eyes danced over the page. As much as I wanted to stare, I looked at my phone, trying to distract myself. He didn’t need me staring at him while he thought of a line. He didn’t even need tothinkof a line, but I was grateful for the help.
“What about ‘not building a foundation on shifting ground’ or something like that,” he said after a long time. My head popped up. I jumped to my feet.
“Carter, you’re a genius!” I said, practically running to him.
Before I grabbed the book—anddefinitelybefore I thought better of it—I pecked Carter’s cheek with a kiss. I then grabbed my book from his hand and headed back to the couch, where I began scribbling in his words. I hummed a little, thought, then wrote it down, only erasing once or twice until I was sure I got it. I was about halfway done writing the new barrage of ideas when it dawned on me that I’dkissedhim.
When I looked back up, Carter was staring. I knew that look in his eyes, but what got me was the blush. I made Carter Black blushagain.I pushed my legs together, unable to help what seeing him like that did to me. I hoped he didn’t noticethattoo.
“What?” I asked, as if I didn’t already know.
“Nothin’,” he answered, voice low. He cleared his throat and pushed off the desk. “I’m a genius, huh? Aren’t there royalties I should be gettin’ for that, then?” He stepped toward me, slowly. A predator stalking his caged in prey. He leaned down, his muscular arms on either side of me, trapping me.
