Page 172 of Debts and Desires
“Don’t, Carter. Please.”
“Don’twhat,Emogen? Huh? Don’t mention thatIlost it all when you ran off? That you fuckin’ shattered me?” She looked away, her lower lip wobbling. “You left and everythin’ went to shit. My best friend won’t talk to me, my dog won’t come to me except at night so he’s not howlin’ by himself. The fuckin’ cat ignores me, too. Hell, even fuckin’Casswon’t talk to me. I can’t sleep without dreamin’ about you. Can’t stomach food anymore.The only good thing I have goin’ is that the shop’s been busy and my employees work hard. Helps keep my mind off of the achin’ fuckin’ hole in my chest. Butsure. Tell me thatyoumight lose it all.”
“Please just sign it,” she whispered. I couldn’t just sign it. If I signed it, that meant she was gone again. This time for good. No.
“Yeah. Fine, I’ll sign it.” She looked up. “Under one condition, since you’re good at making deals.” Hurt etched over her face. “I want tonight. With you. As soon as I’m done working.”
“You can’t just… sign it?” she pleaded.
“No.”
“Carter, please?—”
“I saidno. You come home with me tonight. That’s the deal or I’m not signin’ shit.” Her eyes met mine slowly and I knew she could tell I wasn’t budging.
“O-okay. I’ll go home with you,” she whispered, defeated. It was that little spark in her eyes that got me. I would’ve left her alone otherwise, but I couldn’t stop myself. I wasted no time, all but shoving her against the wall and claiming her mouth. I swallowed the sweetest gasp as my tongue shoved its way into her parted lips. Fuck, this was a mistake. Because now? Now I wasneverletting her go. She whimpered as I devoured her mouth, reminding her just who she fucking belonged to. I had to force myself to pull away.
“I need to clean up and we can go.”
“I thought you said after work…”
“I said as soon as I was done workin’. And I’ve decided I’m done for the day. You go on out and wait in your car. I’ll follow you when I get out.” I went to step away but stopped, forcing her back against the wall. “And so help me, Emmy. If you leave, I’ll sue you and that company over this. I’ll tell everyone you cheated me out of a record deal, too,” I said, grabbing her hand that held the folder and giving it a little shake. Her eyes widened, but she nodded. I left the office and headed to my station to clean up, catching a glimpse of her blonde hair as she got into her car. She didn’t leave.
When I was finished, I let everyone know I was heading out for the day. No one said a thing and I was glad about it. They were a good bunch and I was lucky to have them. I walked to her car and knocked on the window, making her jump. She put the window down.
“Go on. I’m right behind you,” I said. Not waiting for a response, I walked to my Blazer and followed her home.
72. KNEW BETTER
March 10
Seventy-Six Days Gone
Putting my car in park, I stared at the house. The whole drive over, I thought about how Carter claimed my mouth. How I just stood there and let him. How Ienjoyedit, missing the feeling of it. I looked around the yard, my brows coming together.
The grass was high, as if no one had lived there for weeks. I swallowed. Carter was usually on top of things. The more I thought about it, the more I realized how tired he had looked. His beard was longer and his hair unkempt. He looked skinnier somehow, too, as if he hadn’t been eating. My heart hurt, especially after remembering his words at the shop. Too many emotions flooded over me.
Oh, no you don’t, you stupid bitch.
Don’t youdarefeel sorry for that psycho.
But I couldn’t help it. I still?—
The knock on the window had me jumping out of my skin. I turned the engine off and unlocked the door. I didn’t get a chance to do anything else when Carter opened it, extending his hand to help me out. I swallowed hard, afraid he could see thebump that was starting to show. I was a bigger girl to begin with, but it was starting to get obvious. I pushed his hand away and got out, making sure to turn myself so that he couldn’t see.
What do I tell him? Should I tell him?
I looked up at the dog door on the porch, but it was empty.
“Where’s Mac?” I asked.
“Probably sleepin’,” he answered. “He’s been a dick.” I wanted to ask what he meant, but I knew the answer. Mac was upset I’d left. “What do you need out of here?”
“I didn’t bring anything with me.”
“Luckily for you, you left some shit behind.” I looked away. I wasn’t going to apologize.Hewas the one that needed to. I was about to say just that, but he walked away. I followed, and we headed inside.
Just as Carter had said, Mac was asleep on the couch. Well, I couldn’t tell if he was asleep or not. He had his back to us. And on his back was BJ. She saw me and stood, stretching before making her way to me. I petted the kitten, who was more like an awkward lanky teen-cat now.
