Page 110 of Debts and Desires
“I’m just better,” I said, sticking my tongue out.
“Ain’t arguin’ with that. You’re better than anyone I’ve ever met,” he said and it struck a chord. I felt my cheeks heat, unable to hide the smile, even when I bit my lip. I settled back into bed with… withmyboys.
“See? Isn’t this nice?”
“No, because I can’t touch or hold you,” he grumbled. I sat up again, snapping my fingers so that Mac moved back to the foot of the bed, lowering himself with a loudhmph.Carter snuggled up to me immediately, and we stared at each other for a while.
“So, why isn’t he allowed on beds?” I asked.
“Because his farts are awful.”
I bursted out laughing at him being so crass. But that was Carter. I wouldn’t change him for anything, even fame.
I realized that something really had changed. I hadn’t been imagining it. That we weren’t just two people in an agreement anymore. Yes, we had agreed on it—well, I professed it—but we were something more. Something deeper. And suddenly, it all made sense. All the times I had felt like my body wasn’t mine alone, but his… The way I could feel him everywhere, even when he was nowhere near me… It all clicked into place.
And when I looked down at him this time, I saw it. I saw thepassion, the desire. I saw the need, the want. I saw the softness, the kindness, the protection.
I saw the love.
Later, I would try to convince myself it wasn’t love, but I saw it. I knew what that look was because it reflected what was on my own.
Eventually,we cuddled back up. I wrote in my notebook—far away from the pages I’d touched earlier—and Carter laid there watching me. He had his head resting on my chest, his big arm draped over me. I would’ve sworn he was asleep had it not been the slow circles he was tracing on my left hip. Him being there, the warmth, the slight snores coming from Mac at the foot of the bed while it gently rained outside…
I sat my notebook down and closed my eyes. Carter moved the two of us, so that I was on his chest. We laid like that for a long time, neither one talking. It was comfortable.
“So, question,” he started.
“Answer.”
“We, uh, haven’t really talked about… since…” he trailed. I knew what he meant. I had wanted to talk about it, too. But we hadn’t had time since we werebusy.My core lit up at the memory, but I ignored it.
“What would you like to talk about?” Even though I was certain I knew what he meant, I wanted to double-check. You know what they say about assuming.
“I don’t know. I just wanted to make sure you meant what you said. That you didn’t just say it out of passion or whatever.” I snorted.
“Which part?”
“The hours.”
“I meant it.”
“No more hours?”
“No more hours,” I confirmed.
“Guess that really does make you my girl, then?” I didn’trespond, unsure if it was a statement or a question. I looked up at him.
“Are you blushing right now, Carter Black?” I asked, poking his cheek. He swatted my hand away. When I didn’t let up, I found myself pinned to the mattress. Mac let out a low warning growl to Carter. I laughed.
“Mac, down,” Carter ground out. Mac didn’t move, making me laugh a second time. “Fine. Then he stays in the bed while I fuck you.”
“No!” I gasped. “I don’t want him to see.”
“Then tell him to get down so I can let him out and fuck you silly.” Carter moved off of me, heading for the door. I repeated Carter’s words and Mac moved immediately.
“Go lay down,” Carter said as he shut the door behind Mac. He turned back to me, that predatory look on his face. I pushed myself as far into the headboard as I could, but that didn’t save me. He crawled from the foot of the bed, his arm muscles rippling as he literally stalked me like prey. He latched onto an ankle, dragging me down. My laughs quickly turned to moans as his mouth went between my thighs.
The rest of the day was a blur, with Carter taking his time to make me lose my mind from pleasure. He made sure we took breaks, ate, and drank water. But for the most part, he was buried deep inside me.
