Page 101 of Debts and Desires
“That’s enough cake,” mom said, pulling the plate from my hand. “You are the biggest one here, Emogen. Go drink your mint water.” Ilooked back at her, tears filling my eyes. “Stop that. You need to grow up. Do you see Margot, Elena, or Oliver crying anytime they don’t get their way?” I turned to see my older siblings scowling at me.
“You weren’t even supposed to be born,” Elena said.
“Yeah, I was the boy they wanted. You were a mistake,” Oliver added, crossing his arms.
“Come on guys, it’s not her fault she isn’t wanted,” Margot chided.
I couldn’t take it anymore. I turned and ran. Ran until I was so far I couldn’t hear them anymore. I bumped into Mia. She turned her nose up and turned from me.
“I want you to leave,” she said.
Heavy. I felt so heavy. Like the joy was being sucked out of my soul.
Please, I wanted to beg, but when I turned again, she was gone and I was at Pete’s. I sat alone at the bar, the dim light casting eerie shadows on the worn wooden surface.
Thirsty. I was so thirsty.
The only drink before me was mint water. Had mom found me here, too? I couldn’t stomach it, pushing the pitcher away from me, the sound of it scraping across the bar like nails on a chalkboard.
From the depths of the kitchen emerged Cassie. “Fat bitch,” she spat, each syllable dripping with malice. She poured the water over my head, but it wasn’t water. It was syrup? Oliver was back, laughing.
“Mom’s going to kill you,” he said.
“But you did it!”
“Yeah, because your fat ass was hogging it. So I made sure you got every last drop.”
“Nice,” Elena said while Margot smiled.
“She’s just average,” Cassie added, and they all laughed. Even Sawyer, who came up beside me, grabbing my arm.
“Come home with me,” Sawyer said, his voice growing distorted. “Fat bitch.”
“Fat bitch. Fat bitch.” They all sang.
I tried to speak, to defend myself against the onslaught of verbal assaults, but the words caught in my throat, suffocated by the weight of my own insecurities.
I needed Carter. I needed Carter. Where was Carter?!
I ran out of Pete’s, out into the darkness, my heart pounding in my chest. But no matter how fast I ran, the echoes of their voices followed me. I ran until I was pushed up against the brick wall, the man’s nose grazing over me, his hand on my hip, the other pressing the gun into my side.
No… NO. I had to run, I couldn’t. I was stuck. I was?—
I wokeup to the harsh buzz of my phone alarm, groggy and disoriented. The bed was empty and cold, creating a frown on my lips.
Rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I stumbled out of bed and made my way downstairs. The moment I opened the bedroom door, I was greeted with the scent of bacon and eggs. My stomach protested the thought of food.
“Mornin’, Buttercup,” Carter greeted as I sat. His eyes darkened slightly as he looked me over. I realized then I was only in his shirt and panties. Mac rose from his bed, trotting over to lie at my feet with a loud huff.
“Morning,” I offered back.
“Hungry?”
“Not really.”
“Feelin’ okay?” he asked, a brow raised. I gave a nod, sipping on the coffee he already had waiting for me.
“Yeah. I’m still kind of full from dinner.” It wasn’t a complete lie. My stomach was already full from the weight of anxiety that had settled in the pit.
