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Only in my nightmares, Nana. Only in my nightmares.

“Nana.” Fred motioned for Harry to clear away the empty tea cups, and he took them as he left. “Don’t you think you’ve had enough excitement for today? I’m worried about you.”

“Nonsense,” she said, batting away his concern. “Don’t tell me you’re avoiding the topic just like Delilah is. I’m not well, you know. Nothing would make this dying old lady happier than to see her two favourite grandchildren get married.”

Aside from the fact she was blackmailing us… “Do not say that to anyone else,” I warned her. “It sounds rather… incestuous.”

She blinked innocently at me. “Why? I regard Fred as my own grandson. You could make that happen for me. It’d make me so happy as I die, you know.”

“Please stop talking about dying,” I mumbled. “I know you’re joking, but I wish you’d stop.”

“It’s a fact, dear.” She dismissed me as easily as she had Fred’s earlier concern. “I just want to know you’re happy and taken care of.”

Fred caught my eye, then slipped one arm around me and rested his other hand over mine. I was picking at the skin on my thumb again, but his touch instantly stilled my hands, and I almost jumped when his fingers curled around mine.

“Nana, you don’t need to use your illness to blackmail us,” Fred said. “Besides, Deli still hasn’t fully accepted your decision yet. Be a bit gentler with her, would you?”

Look at that.

He was pretty good at playing the boyfriend.

Nana sniffed, looking at Granny, who nodded. “Fine,” Nana said. “I’m sorry, dear. I forget you haven’t quite caught up to my dark humour yet.”

“Some humour,” I muttered.

Fred lightly rubbed my arm with his hand. “As for us getting married… Well, you know why we kept things a secret, don’t you? We know this is something you’ve both always wanted, and we didn’t want to upset you if things didn’t work out between us. We thought it was best to keep it between us until we were sure we were in it for the long haul.”

What was he—

“And are you?” Nana’s eyes glittered.

Fred looked down at me, a cheeky smile on his face. “Are you, Deli?”

I blinked at him. “I… I…”

“Because I am.”

What was this crazy bastard saying now?

“But if Deli isn’t ready, then I’ll respect that, Nana. Marriage is a big thing, and I don’t want to force her into it. I’ll only propose to her when she says she wants me to.”

That would never, ever happen.

Was he sweet-talking his way out of the marriage thing? I wasn’t a fan of faking anything, but faking a relationship was way better than actually getting married and then dealing with the legalities of that mess.

Nana stared at me, her sharp eyes surveying every inch of my face. “Lala, what do you think?”

“Hm?” I jerked my full attention back towards her. “About what?”

“Marrying Fred.”

“Marrying… Fred,” I said slowly. “Right. Um. We’ve… uh, we’ve spoken about it a little, but I haven’t really… You know… Thought about it.”

“But he just said he’d marry you, dear. He’s ready to marry you. Why don’t you say yes?”

“Because, um…”

Fred poked me in the side, and I twitched.