Page 93 of The Duke's Inconvenient Bride
“I don’t think she even tried to be discreet,” he said. “Everyone knew, and my father became unmanageable because of it. He obsessed over her. Kept a close eye on her. But it never mattered. Even if he’d caught her red-handed, he’d have forgiven her because she knew just how to play him.”
It was a shame the former duchess was dead. Emma would have liked to have stern words with her.
“She made him weak,” Vaughan said. “And it didn’t only affect him. Boys at school taunted me about it, and Reginald was the worst. I tried speaking to Father, but he only cared about his own feelings.”
“I’m so sorry.” The duke should have protected his son.
“Even when she died in a carriage accident with one of her paramours, he didn’t stop loving her. He withered away and died soon after. With her gone, I think he stopped caring whether he continued breathing, so one day he just didn’t.”
Emma’s insides were a tangled web of sympathy and horror. She could understand now why the idea of a love match was so repugnant to Vaughan. His parents had set a terrible example, and on top of that, it sounded as if neither his mother nor his father had been as present for him as they should have been.
“That isn’t proper love,” she said firmly, twining her fingers in the blankets again so she wouldn’t reach for his hand. “A real love match isn’t one-sided. From what you’ve said, I assume that your mother used your father’s love to machinate against him, and whether intentionally or not, to hurt him. That isn’t right, and I’m sorry for it.”
Vaughan didn’t react. If not for the movement of his throat as he swallowed, she might have thought he hadn’t heard her.
“Neither of them cared for you as they should have either.”
They’d failed as parents, in Emma’s opinion. Her own parents had never coddled her, but at least she’d known they cared on some level.
“It wasn’t…,” Vaughan trailed off.
Emma clenched her fists. She really wanted to hold him.
“Love doesn’t have to be that way,” she said, willing him to understand. “It can be beautiful if both people are equally invested.”
He turned to face her. “As it stands, I think you would be more invested than I, Emma. And while I don’t wish to be in my father’s position, nor do I wish to play the role my mother did. I won’t misuse you that way.”
“Then don’t.” Emma growled in frustration. “Do you believe me to be coercive?”
He hesitated, then said, “No.”
“Good. I don’t consider you to be that way either. In which case, there’s no reason we can’t try. If it could make us happy, isn’t it worth taking a chance?”
She wanted it more than anything, and she was so close to helping Vaughan break through his self-imposed barriers that she could almost taste it.
But then he shook his head.
“I’m sorry, Emma. I don’t say this to hurt you, but you have to realize that you will never get the love you so desperately want from me.”
CHAPTER 22
Vaughan feltas though he’d been turned inside out, his organs on display for the world to see. He rose from the bed, trying not to look at Emma, whose expression a moment ago had devastated him.
He’d tried to tell her earlier. He’d made his boundaries clear.
But still, she was hurt.
He wanted to fix it, but he’d come to her room to help her in the first place, and he’d only made things worse. He had no doubt he was capable of doing the same thing all over again.
“I’ll make sure Violet doesn’t bother you,” he said gruffly, and then he left. He closed the bedroom door behind himself, relieved she didn’t call out after him.
He strode down the hall, encountering one of the maids coming out of the bedchamber Violet and her husband were occupying.
“Beth,” he said.
She turned to him.
“Can you please inform Mrs. Mayhew that her sister is sleeping and isn’t to be disturbed?”
