Page 60 of Phoenix Falling
I was fucked. So fucked. Majorly fucked.
I lay with my body utterly lax, unable to hold myself up over Rissa’s unconscious body, my muscles useless as I gasped for breath in the long moments after I came. Although coming didn’t really describe exactly what I’d felt. I’d come before; this was something else entirely. This was like turning my body inside out, everything inside me determined and desperate to empty all that I was, all that I had into my mate.
My mate.
Our mate.
Shit.
I shouldn’t be, but God, I was grateful Rissa had passed out. I’d come close, but I needed this moment. I needed to understand the way my world had fundamentally shifted the moment I’d realized I wasn’t simply fucking some woman—I was taking my mate, giving her my body and taking hers in a way that would change me forever. I’d known Rissa was different, known I couldn’t stop thinking about her, but even then I hadn’t realized… And then I’d come, and it was like my consciousness had exploded with pleasure and I’d awakened on the other side as someone else entirely.
Not Sun. Not the prince and sure as hell not the king of the Archai.
I was Rissa’s mate. Nothing else mattered.
I was definitely fucked.
I felt her stir beneath me. Before she could awaken, I tucked my mouth against her ear.
“I love you, mate.”
“And I have to let you go.”
But not yet. Coming up on my elbows, I stared down at the woman who held the other half of my soul. Her eyelashes fluttered. Despite my climax, I hadn’t gone soft inside her. I didn’t know if I could, not now that I’d had a taste of her. Without conscious though I lifted my body up, pivoting at the hips, pushing inside her, retreating, slower and easier than before but deliberately, intent on waking up the pleasure once more.
Rissa opened her eyes. “Sun?”
“Hey, beautiful.” Every ounce of love and wonder and despair I felt came out in those four syllables.
She frowned. “What’s wrong?”
She really could read me well. Her hand came up to my face, her thumb tracing the ridge of my cheekbone. I leaned into her. “Just regretting that I have to go soon,” I said, closing my eyes to hide my deception.
She stretched beneath me, forcing her body down on my shaft. I groaned. The sight of her when I looked down, all stretched out, her body open to me, accepting mine, nearly made me come.
“Probably me too. Although I’d rather stay here,” she said, her eyes closing as a little smile appeared on her full lips. Without disengaging, I pulled myself up on my knees, her ass on my thighs, her legs laid out along either side of me. Beginning a firm massage on her inner thighs, I suggested, “Maybe we have a little more time.”
She arched again, this time deliberately. My eyes crossed at the feel of her engulfing me. “Maybe so.”
A half hour later we were headed for the car. Longer than I should’ve taken, but far shorter than what I’d desired. On the threshold I paused to let Rissa pass me out the door. A glance back showed the bed, still messy, the sheets tangled at the end where we had thrown them to gain better access to each other’s bodies. Her ripped panties lay on the ground next to the bed. I knew, just looking, that I could never bear to come back here. It had been my secret retreat, but not anymore. Now it was laced with memories of Rissa, and it was best to leave those memories in the past.
Exactly where I was forced to leave her.
I drove us carefully back to town, holding tight to the reins of my emotions. It was around three in the morning when I pulled up to the curb at her usual bus stop. I’d never questioned why Rissa didn’t tell me where she lived, but that was probably for the best. It would be too easy to become a stalker if I had that little piece of information.
Maybe she’d guessed all along that at some point it would come to this.
I put the car in park, took a deep breath, and reached for her. She smelled of sweet woman and sex, and I inhaled deeply at her throat before pulling back to kiss her one long last time. “I’ll text you?”
It came out a question when it wasn’t. I wouldn’t contact her again, but I couldn’t bear to tell her that.
“Okay.” She gave me another quick peck before reaching for the door handle. “I’ll be around.”
“Goodbye, Rissa.” It was the first time I’d ever told her that. The first time I’d ever letgoodbyetouch my lips after they’d touched hers. I could at least leave her with that.
She paused, one foot on the street, one still in the car. When she looked back over her shoulder, her face in dark shadow, I couldn’t read it. Or maybe I just didn’t want to read it. But I knew she stared at me for a long, long moment before finally saying, “Bye, Sun.”
And then she was gone.
