Page 39 of 40 and (No Longer) Fighting It
Claire could protest. She could refuse to have this conversation here, now, in her place of business. She could point out exactly how rude her mother was being. But that in itself was a measure of how upset Mama was, because she was never rude. And honestly, Claire would rather get this, whatever this ended up being, over with.
She glanced at Lincoln as she fished her keys from her pocket. “Would you mind locking up for me?”
Lincoln’s look was full of concern but also an understanding that steadied her. He took the keys, squeezing her hand gently in the process. “Anything you need, sweetheart.”
Lanelle ignored Lincoln as Claire gestured her behind the counter and led her out through the kitchen. They exited the back and climbed the stairs to Claire’s apartment in silence. Only when the door was closed behind them, shutting them into privacy, did the explosion come.
“Are you sleeping with that man, Claire?”
Claire took a seat on the couch and watched as her mother faced off with her across the coffee table. A decade ago, she would have been intimidated. That was something else she’d worked hard on, alongside her own self-esteem. The truth was, despite her family’s narrow views, she did love them. She loved her mother. She simply couldn’t live like them anymore. Didn’t want to.
“How is what I do with Lincoln any of your business, Mama?”
Her mother gaped. “Your reputation,” she sputtered. “You’ll have the entire town thinking you’re living in sin. You’re already showing off with all that dancing in the pub and—”
Of course someone had mentioned them dancing in the pub. “We went dancing once.” Probably would again tomorrow night, but she refrained from mentioning that. And Jesus, even if she had done something salacious, maybe she was justified. Lincoln was hotter than a deep-fried pepper sprout. Being turned on anytime she was around him was her new norm. “And why am I explaining this to you? Dancing is not wrong. We weren’t having sex on the dance floor, for God’s sake.”
Her mother’s tight mouth said they might as well have been. “You’ve always been…headstrong, Claire. But this man…he must’ve done something to corrupt you. Is he the one convincing you to leave your family?”
“I’m not leaving my family.”
“You threw your brother out of your bakery.” Lanelle shook her head. “What kind of daughter have I raised?”
“You’ve raised a daughter who knows her own mind and has decided what she should and should not put up with. I got tired of Daran crossing that line.”
“You don’t have the right to—”
Claire stood. “That’s where you’re wrong.” Claire forced herself to take a deep breath, to relax as best she could. “First, Mama, my place of business is not a stage for family free-for-alls. And second, I am not obligated to listen to anyone’s opinion, nor do I have to allow it into my life if it hurts me.”
“Hurts you?” Her mother planted a fist on her hip. Claire fought a sudden surge of sadness in her chest. She stood just like that so often. Just like her mama. But in some things they were no longer so alike. “Daran is your brother, and you’re saying he hurt you? How can Christian charity hurt you?”
“You mean charity towards Jared and his wife?”
Lanelle sighed. “Your brother loves you; we all do. Just because we refuse to approve the choices you’ve made in your life—”
Claire shook her head. “I haven’t made any choices that need your approval.”
“According to the rumors around town, you’ve made plenty of choices that are questionable. That man down there in your store—”
“Treats me with a helluva lot more respect than Jared ever did. He may not be a hometown good ol’ boy, he may live in New York and have tattoos and dance at the pub, but he’s a good man. That you would judge him without even meeting him, based on rumors you have no way of knowing are true or not, is ridiculous. Even more ridiculous is that the lot of you are so hell-bent on approving Jared’s choices when he broke our marriage vows and cheated on me. How’s that for good Christian morals?”
“Don’t sass me, Claire.”
“It’s not sass, Mama. It’s the truth.” She released another breath, allowing the tension straining her muscles to drain away. It didn’t matter whether her mother approved of Lincoln or not. What mattered was how they’d treated Claire her whole life. She’d known the time had come to have it out when she’d made her stand against Daran, and in some ways she’d been stealing herself for its approach, but she’d never be truly ready. She’d hoped she’d never need to be.
That hope was long gone.
“I think it’s time we just lay everything out,” she said.
Lanelle crossed her arms over her chest. “Probably right.”
Claire gave herself a moment. “I know that you’re not happy with the choices that I’ve made. That I couldn’t have children. That I couldn’t tolerate—”
“Forgive.”
“ForgiveJared’s infidelity.” Yeah, that wasn’t ever happening. “That I couldn’t somehow convince him to stay despite getting another woman pregnant.” Her voice choked up, and she cleared her throat. “But I am done worrying about whether or not any of those things made you happy. What I had hoped was that you could love me for who I am, broken body and divorced and actual career and all, and just want me to be happy. That you could see the success that I have and be glad that I have a good life.”
“Of course I want you to be hap—”
