Page 40 of 40 and (Tired of) Faking It
Papa let her think while they sat, absorbing the silence and sipping their coffee. Finally he squeezed her hand. “Let me ask you this: That Mason punk has been flapping his gums for years. Did any of the things he told people about you change who you are inside?”
She hadn’t realized he’d heard the things Mason had spread about her, and for a moment shame choked her up—not because what Mason had said was true, but because her sex life was such a public topic of discussion, then and now. But her grandfather had never looked at her differently, never treated her differently in all this time. Her mother had once laughed when Lily said generations past had seemed to have less sex.
“Oh, honey, there was plenty of sex back then. We just didn’t talk about it as much as they do today. There’s a reason the f-word has been around for centuries.”
Papa’d had a wife, a child. He was nowhere close to naive. And he loved her.
She’d been so lucky with her family.
“No,” she said quietly. “The things Mason said didn’t change who I was at all.”
“That’s right. And what other people bark about now can’t either.” He stared out over the valley as if it held the true meaning of life, and maybe it did. “Be your true, loving self, Lily girl. Not what you think others expect you to be. That’s what gives your life meaning.”
She nodded, letting her gaze drift over the land as well. She fiddled with her mug, a soft sigh escaping her. “What should I do about all this mess, Papa?”
He just smiled. “You live your life, punkin’. And tell everyone else to buzz off.”
She had to laugh at that, and with it a lot of the pent-up anger and hurt she’d been carrying around released. Oh, it wasn’t completely gone; she knew that would take time. Maybe a lot of time. This wasn’t over, after all. They still had the council meeting to deal with. And she knew from past experience that people would bring up rumors when she least expected it. But for now, she didn’t want to let them steal any more of herself.
Or any more of the time she had with JD, limited as it would seem to be.
“So you’ve heard about the stuff with Mason then?”
His expression gave nothing away. “You’d be surprised what all I hear, punkin’.”
She eyed him suspiciously. He stared at the horizon.
“You already knew about what happened Thursday night before I came over here, didn’t you?”
“Mhmm.”
Lord. “How much did you hear, exactly?”
“Oh, Lou filled me in.”
Lou? Her grandfather and Lou talked? And good God, Lou was probably as disapproving as everyone else who’d contacted her office. “Did she call to tattle about what your granddaughter was getting up to?” She tried to keep her tone light. Probably didn’t pull it off well, but she tried, at least.
“She called to brag on your man.”
Lily choked on a sip of coffee. “My man?”
“Mhmm.”
My man?The words whirled in her brain for a moment. “JD is not my man, Papa. He’s only here for the resort, and then he’ll be going back to New York.” It’s what she had to keep reminding herself. What she’d experienced with JD Thursday night had been…mind-blowing. Overwhelming. But she was too old to believe physical pleasure and emotional connection were the same thing. Yes, she’d enjoyed every minute she spent with JD this past week, and she thought he had too. They’d certainly both enjoyed the sex. But that didn’t mean there was a relationship on the horizon.
No matter how much she secretly wished there was.
“JD is not my man, Papa,” she repeated firmly.
“If you say so.”
“I do.”
“Mhmm.”
Grrr. She loved her grandfather to death, but he could be infuriatingly dense when he wanted to be. And she didn’t want him mistaking this for something it wasn’t.
Her grandfather had moved on, however. “What does JD have to say about all this gossip?”
