Page 55 of Desire Me
Elliot shrugged. “Sure you can. You’ve survived being run over by a car, chased by the mob (or whoever these people are), figuring out your entire past while healing from major head trauma. You’re a badass bitch; you can do this, easy.”
Rae dropped her gaze to her feet, sans the sassy socks she usually wore. “Easy, huh?” A smile threatened to peek around her hurt.
Elliot gave her shoulder a squeeze. “Easy.”
The team was gone through lunch, and Rae took the time to think, really think. About what Elliot had said. About what her heart said. What her gut was telling her. But she kept coming back to one thing, and when they’d finished lunch and cleaned up, she gave Elliot a glance as the other woman walked back toward the dining room and the team equipment piled in there, then turned to Leah.
“Could we talk privately?”
“Yes,” Leah said, her words firm, as if she expected Elliot to protest, “we can.”
Elliot raised a brow but kept moving toward work. “Have at it.”
“As if we needed her permission,” Rae muttered—under her breath, of course. “God, that gets on my nerves.”
“What does?” Leah asked as they walked into the bedroom. Rae shut the door firmly behind them.
“Elliot.”
“She certainly has confidence to spare.”
That was just it. That confidence irritated Rae. Oh, she had no doubt it was earned, and she had to admit, she also admired the woman’s strength. Nothing helpless or weak about Elliot.
Therein lay the problem, she thought.
“What did you want to talk about?” Leah asked.
“Leah, I’m tired of being helpless.”
Leah walked to an armchair in the corner of the room and sat. “Helplessness does suck, I know.”
Rae sat on the end of the bed and rubbed her hands up and down her thighs. “Everyone around me is looking out for me. What about looking out for myself?” She remembered that now, remembered standing on her own two feet after her parents died, remembered even before then being the one who took care of her cousins when they were not much younger than she was. The patchwork quilt of her memories told her she’d always been capable, in control, but now…that had been stolen from her, and taking everything on faith on top of being physically impaired was almost more than she could stand.
The team was out there gathering information so that she could be safe. What if there was information she could gather on her own?
“What did you have in mind?”
Rae swallowed down her nerves, cleared her throat, and after a deep breath said, “Can you get me in touch with my cousins?”
Leah frowned. “Do you think that’s a good idea? We still don’t know who is responsible for all this.”
“And without more information, we never will. But I think I know how we can eliminate some possibilities.”
Her friend seemed to consider that. “Okay, what do you suggest?”
Leah contacted Eli, Remi’s brother, the crazy computer genius that had provided so much of their intel so far. Once she had a phone number, Rae took out the cell phone Leah had given her and dialed quickly, before she lost her nerve.
“Hello?”
The voice was familiar. That knowledge started a tingle at the back of her nose, the memories suddenly sparking in her mind causing a rush of tears to her eyes. Playing at the seashore with three little boys, chasing them across the sand. Investigating all the tiny creatures living in the tide pools with a little dark-haired toddler. Ice cream sandwiches on the dock, and pop on a shaded front porch.
“Hello?”
“Nathan?”
“Rae?” A bitter laugh came through the phone. “What’s with the formality, RaeRae? You’ve been gone for months, only an occasional postcard to keep us up on your adventures, and all of a sudden you’re phoning out of the blue and calling me Nathan? Jeez, way to fuck off your best friend.”
She closed her eyes, searched her memory. What adventure was he talking about? What postcards? But her brain failed her here, refusing to supply any information, and she had no idea how to respond. “I’m sorry, Nate.”
