Page 14 of Destroy Me
He eased his grip and slid his hand down until his fingers tangled with hers. Their palms pressed together. Lyse shot him a surprised look, then focused ahead again. No smart-arseI told you so. She seemed to delight in doing what he least expected.
The difference between the Lyse he’d known for the past four years and this Lyse threw him off balance. The old Lyse hadn’t the backbone of this one, wouldn’t have been one to argue with him, much less kiss him. She’d been timid, blushing and stumbling over her words whenever he was near. The new Lyse was more self-contained, less fearful—she fought back. And God, that kiss—
He shook off the memory, his lips tightening. The old Lyse had been a lie; he knew that now. The hero worship he’d soaked up hadn’t been real. Now, here, he felt more like he’d peeled back her layers and found the harder core of her. She might still be betraying him, probably was betraying him, but at least she wasn’t playacting anymore.
That this new Lyse got him a helluva lot harder than the old one was something he’d really rather not be thinking about. Ever.
It was half eight, not so late in the evening that the streets were empty, but few people lingered at this time on a weeknight. His mam’s cottage was a ten-minute walk from Lyse’s apartment. They circled around to approach from the north, on the opposite side from their new friend. Fionn kept his face down and turned toward Lyse as if they were sharing an intimate conversation as they entered the path at the front of the house and walked up to the door. Lyse stiffened at his side, reminding him that she was used to being behind a computer screen, not in the field where the enemy was a physical, threatening presence, not a shadow of pixels that couldn’t touch you, hurt you. He tightened his fingers on hers, whether to keep her from escaping or to reassure her, he refused to think about.
At the front door he raised his hand and knocked. Only when the knob turned did it fully strike him that he was about to be seeing his mam for the first time in years. He would be face-to-face with the woman he’d given up his life for, the only person in the world who knew him inside and out. She was here, now, on the other side of this door. He wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but his throat closed up, his heartbeat thumping hard in his ears as the door opened and a shaft of light fell across them.
“Lyse, dear! I wasn’t expecting you till the weekend. Come in.”
She wasn’t looking directly at him. Waiting, he soaked in the sight of her—the thick auburn hair she’d passed on to him, clear blue eyes with the faintest lines around them. She was in her midfifties now but could easily pass for a decade younger, still lithe and vibrating with energy just as she had when he was younger. Christ, she was a beautiful sight.
Lyse moved inside, their entwined hands pulling him with her. Emotion welled in his chest until he wasn’t sure he could speak without tears.
“Who’s your young man, then?” his mam was asking.
He was after keeping his face turned away from the door until it closed, not wanting Ferrina’s man to catch a good glimpse, but now he tugged off the cap and glasses and allowed his mam a straight-on look.
“Fionn!”
Her shout of surprise echoed in his ears seconds before her arms circled his throat. The scent of vanilla and spice filled his nose, that same as he remembered from his childhood. It was warmth and adventure and love wrapped in a lungful of air, and he took another one, wanting to saturate himself with it, wanting the reality that his mam was in his arms after so long apart to truly sink in.
“Mam.”
Her grip was tight, almost choking, but he wasn’t protestin’, not when he felt the wet warmth of tears on his neck. His arms around her were just as tight. They held on for long moments, and it wasn’t until Lyse began removing her coat beside them that the reality of why he was here resurfaced. Gently he eased back to meet his mam’s tearful gaze.
What did he say after all this time?
“What— How—” Siobhan looked from him to Lyse, stuttering. Having the same problem as him, apparently.
“I’ll explain, Mam.” He reached over and turned the lock on the door, then ushered her into the living room with a hand at her back. Lyse moved ahead of them without prompting.
“Whatever are you doing here, Fionn?” Keeping her hand on his arm, she gazed between him and Lyse. “How do you two know each other?”
And it finally registered—his mam knew Lyse. They knew each other. Lyse hadn’t merely been watching Siobhan; she’d inserted herself into his mam’s life.
Something cold washed over him. Cold and lethal. In that moment Lyse’s eyes met his, a myriad of emotions playing across her face: fear, pleading, resignation. She didn’t want him telling the truth. She wanted him to lie like she had, to let her go on fooling his mam like she’d fooled everyone at Global First.
No fecking way. His mam deserved the truth. And Lyse deserved the consequences.
“Do you know who she is, Mam?”
Siobhan gave him the smile that was so like his own. “Of course. Lyse Camden.”
He shook his head, refusing to look Lyse’s way. “No, not Lyse Camden. Lyse Sheppard. She’s a computer hacker who used to be working at Global First. The woman who almost got me killed two months ago. And she’s been watching you.”
Chapter Seven
Siobhan would never look at her the same.
She’d known the second she’d looked into Fionn’s eyes that he would tell his mother who she was. That didn’t mean she hadn’t hoped. But no matter how much she protested that her friendship with Siobhan had been by chance, had been genuine, Fionn would never believe her. And neither would his mother now. Who would believe a woman with Lyse’s past over their own son?
Siobhan was staring at Fionn, a deep vee between her brows. “What—”
A loud knock on the front door cut off her question. Fionn immediately went into warrior mode, one hand reaching for the small of his back. Lyse caught the move from the corner of her eye and startled. It used to be common for her coworkers to be armed. After so many weeks in Ireland, guns were a forgotten accessory. An illegal one too.
