Page 74 of Fall With Me
Before I’m ready, Dawson pulls back. “We should start the movie.”
I hold in my whimper, respecting Dawson’s boundary, despite my desire to do more. “Um, yeah. Yep. Let’s do that.” But as the movie plays, I’m not paying attention at all to who each character is or how they’re all tied together. My mind is stuck replaying the kisses Dawson and I shared tonight. All tiredness leaves my body. I’m alert and hyper focused on every breath and subtle movement Dawson makes.
“You were quiet,” Dawson says, turning the television off. “Did that one scare you?”
“Umm…no, not scary… I’m just…thinking about things.”
“We didn’t have to watch a movie tonight. Are you ready to head home?”
Is he crazy? He’ll have a hard time sending me home.“Not yet.”
He chuckles. “What would you like to do then?”
“How lame would you think I am if I said talk?”
“What about?”
Anything. Everything. “What’s your biggest fear?”
“Dang, 007. You like to go deep.”
“How else are we supposed to get to know each other and find out if we’re compatible long term?”
He sighs. “I see your point. I’ll make you a deal. We’ll answer five easy questions first, then I’ll share my deepest, darkest secrets with you.”
I sit up, pulling my leg onto the couch, bending it on the cushion until I’m facing Dawson. Seeing his face is necessary. Eye contact, facial reactions. I need the connection as we speak. “Fire away.”
“What was your first job?”
Not one I liked. “I was a cashier at Raging Waters. It sucked watching everyone else have fun on the water slides while I was sweating in the heat, taking food orders and scooping ice cream. What about you?”
Dawson’s eyes light up. “I had the best time working at an arcade. When we’d close for the night, me and my friend Travis stayed and played games for hours.”
“Is the arcade where your love of video games developed?”
He tilts his head to the side. “You know, I don’t think I’ve ever thought about it. But, yeah, I think it played a big role.”
“Did you have a favorite game you played?”
“Pac-Man and Tetris. Pac-Man was fun, but Tetris let me use my brain to twist and turn the pieces to fit together. Maybe it’s why I love puzzles as much as I do.”
I take his hand, shaking it. “Look at us figuring you out.”
“Yes, this psychoanalysis is exactly what I’ve been missing in my life,” he deadpans.
I laugh. “Stop. I like learning more about you.”
“I like learning about you, too. What was your favorite birthday growing up?”
He’s turning the table on me. I don’t like thinking about how lonely and boring my birthdays were after Carter and I turned six. “My fifth birthday. My mom took us to Hollywood Connection. Do you remember that place? We spent the entire day there skating, seeing a movie, playing arcade games, going on rides, and mini-golfing. Shortly after, she met a guy who turned our lives upside down. Things were never the same after that.”
Dawson puts his other hand on my leg, giving it a squeeze. “That sounds like an amazing day and a good memory to hold on to.”
“I do treasure it. Whenever I’m super angry, thinking back on how much fun we had that day, it reminds me my mom used to be amazing, before her addiction. When Carter and I turned twenty-one, we went to St. Thomas and spent our weekend doing everything we wish we could have donewith our mom. We had fun, but we both knew it was a mask to hide our disappointment. Maybe my thirtieth will be everything I’ve ever wanted.”
“What does your dream birthday look like?”
“The child in me wants a piñata, a mermaid-themed cake, and a water festival. Oooh, or maybe a trip to Disneyland. I’ve never been, and it’s supposed to be the most magical place on earth.” I whisper as I admit the thing I want most but never let myself dream of having until meeting Dawson. “Now though? I want a family. Children of my own. A spouse who will forgive my mistakes and help me work through my struggles.”
