Page 96 of Fall I Want
“Zane, it was the truth, and I’ll never ever fault you for being real. I prefer it because most people aren’t.” She moves closer to me and I can smell her hair and skin.
My mind eases anytime we touch and it sets me on fire.
I swallow hard and we sit in silence for a few seconds. “You mentioned you were together for six years.”
“Yes,” she mutters.
I do the simple math in my head. “I might fuck him up.”
Autumn tilts her head at me, noticing how I tense. It isn’t my place to say anything, however, guilt creeps over me.
She silently begs me to tell her and I shake my head, not wanting to discuss this any further. While I don’t know many details about their relationship, I know he hurt her, and I won’t be the one to twist the knife. Deep down, she knows he was a cheating bastard. There are always signs, little hints. It’s how I caught my fiancée with my best friend.
“You saw him with another woman, didn’t you?” Autumn breathlessly says. Can she read my mind? Were the words written on my face?
I don’t have the heart to tell it was more than one.
“At the end of the day, does it matter?” I ask. “Will it change your current opinion of him?”
“He’s at the top of my shit list. Wait, are you protecting Sebastian?” she accuses.
This makes me laugh because he’s the last man on earth I’d ever help. “Fuck him. I’m protecting you and your heart.”
After the stunt he pulled tonight, I’m tempted to fire him and ban him from all Xander premises.
“He made me believe I was insecure, jealous, and paranoid. I’ve never been any of those things in my life. Several times he asked me why I didn’t trust him. I want answers.”
I search her eyes. “Sweetheart, I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t,” she whispers. “You’re only confirming the suspicions I’ve had and giving me closure. I need this, please.”
She nearly begs and I release a long breath. Autumn deserves to know the truth, but I fucking hate that I’m the one to deliver.
“At the end of the ski season, we always give our celebrity instructors a two-week all-inclusive stay at the private island resort as a thank-you. For the past decade, Sebastian has brought a different woman with him. None of them were ever you.”
“Everyyear?” Her voice cracks and her jaw tightens.
“Please understand how sorry I am, Autie.” I shake my head and interlock her fingers. “This isn’t a conversation I expected or imagined I’d have with you. It’s not my place.”
The sadness on her face breaks my heart. I tuck loose strands of soft hair behind her ear. When a few tears stream down her cheeks, I wipe them away. I’m fucking livid that Sebastian is still hurting her, that he has the goddamn audacity to try to win her back after disrespecting her so deeply.
“You deserve better, Autumn. He’s not worth crying over.”
“I know,” she states, but the silence lingers on. “These are angry tears. Years of pent-up frustration over being lied to. It makes so much sense now. He told me those trips were for end-of-season training. Fuck,” she hisses, forcefully wiping her face. “I’m not a crier.”
“Sometimes it’s the only way the body can release the emotions.” I open my arms, wanting and needing to hold her. “Come here.”
My pretty girl falls into my chest and I hold her tight against me. She sniffles and I pet her hair, trying to comfort her in the only way I know how, by being here, by being close. The car hugs the finalcurve before taking the long stretch home. Neither of us moves until it stops. She pulls away and wipes her cheeks, forcing a smile.
She chews on the corner of her lip and I rub my thumb across it as she meets my eyes. I want to kiss her, tell her none of it matters, that she’s fucking incredible, but I say nothing.
“You really shouldn’t look at me like that.” I smirk, rolling up my shirtsleeves because my temperature rises when her eyes lock on me in that way.
“I can’t help it,” she says.
“Would you ever take him back?” I ask, needing to know where he stands in her heart.
She glances down at her hands and I appreciate the time she takes to think about it. “No. Being alone with him brought back a lot of memories and none of them were great. Knowing he actually cheated on me and lied about it a handful of times...” She pauses. “The answer is no. I realize why my friends hated him. They saw through it. I’m so glad I went and got tested after we broke up. He could’ve...” She stops and shakes her head. “Tonight, he had the nerve to tell me he wouldn’t stop pursuing me until I was married.”
