Page 115 of Breakaway Goals
“Yeah, we had dinner with him last night,” Zach said. “He flew up to Portland from LA, before he heads back to Florida.”
“So, Morgan came over. Ended up the last one here.”
“Accidentally,” Zach said, and Hayes could hear the impossible-to-see air quotes he was absolutely making.
“Hey, he was helping clean up. Being not an asshole,” Hayes retorted mildly. “Then um, one thing led to another and . . .well, you get the picture.”
“So just sex, then.” Zach sighed heavily. And there was the fucking judgment.
“It wasn’t just sex. It’s . . .he told me he loved me. And you know I love him.”
There was silence on the other end of the line. “Seriously?” Zach sounded shocked.
“We cleared the air, too. We didn’tjustfuck,” Hayes said and couldn’t deny just how defensive he sounded. “I wouldn’t have done that. Not again.”
“Okay,” Zach said. “So you talked.”
“We’re uh . . .well, we’re doing something tomorrow night. A date?” Hayes realized that Morgan had not defined it, but it had to be, right? They weren’t having sex. So what were they going to do? Sit around andtalk. Suddenly, Hayes’ breath went short with panic. To distract himself, he added, “And,and, he’s decided we can’t have sex, so I’ll believe him that he’s not just around to hit it and quit it.”
“Do people even say that anymore?” Zach wondered skeptically.
Hayes was pretty sure he heard Gavin murmur something like,what’s wrong with that?Zach laughed, and then Gavin did too, teasing and full of joy.
Before this morning, even inadvertently overhearing that exchange would have filled Hayes with a bitter regret he’d swallow down because it wasn’t Zach’s fault he was in love with someone who didn’t want him. Who didn’t love him back.
But Morgandid. He’d said it, earnestly and with feeling, more than once. Even if Hayes was understandably nervous, that didn’t change the fact ithadhappened.
“Regardless,” Hayes said confidently. “It’s not just sex. It’s not really sex at all.” It was hard to be optimistic about that, but somehow evennothaving sex with Morgan was better than not having Morgan at all.
He could imagine Zach telling him that he was pathetic.
It was not a hardship to omit that particular thought process. Zach didn’t need to knoweverything.
“It’s weird you sound so happy about that,” Zach said suspiciously. “Was it bad?”
Of course Zach had figured out how weird that was without even being told.
“No! Of course not,” Hayes squawked.
“We believe you,” Gavin said dryly.
“It’s acommitment,” Hayes said with pride.
“And he’s taking you out? Wow. Maybe he really has turned over that asshole leaf for good.”
“He’s been pretty good with Finn, too,” Hayes said.
Morgan had always been tough—on others, sure, but mostly on himself. Unrelenting, even, and nobody had ever really understood how so much of that “asshole” behavior sprang from that drive. But then, they’d never understood, either, what the pressure of being drafted first overall was like. Almost nobody understood, but Hayes always had.
“He’s not as bad as you always make him out to be,” Hayes said.
Zach sighed. Or maybe that was Gavin. Or both of them, actually. “No, he’s absolutely as bad as we make him out to be. Everyone knows it.Youjust like him for all the reasons everyone else doesn’t.”
Hayes wasn’t sure that was true, but he wasn’t sure it wasnottrue, either.
“We understand each other,” Hayes said quietly.
“Right. So you’re going out on a date, and not sleeping together?”
