Page 14 of Breaking the Ice
No matter how good it felt, to be this close to someone else again, to someone he knew andliked—though Gavin could at least acknowledge the affection hadn’t felt like this before, tinged with heat—he should move away. He should move away,becauseit felt so goddamn good.
Because ithadn’tever felt like this before. Zach had been a player of his, and he’d loved him in that way, exclusively. Gangly, self-effacing, well-meaning Zach, who looked out for everyone and just wanted someone to do the same for him.
Back then, he’d even considered himself a pseudo-father figure.
Well, the fucking joke was on him now, because four years later, the rumblings in the base of his stomach felt anything but fatherly.
Shit.
That was the thought that propelled him backward. Away from temptation.
Did Gavin see disappointment flash across Zach’s face? If he did, he pretended he didn’t.
Pretended his heart wasn’t beating double-time.
“Well, uh, it’s late,” Gavin said awkwardly.
Zach nodded. Like he didn’t trust his voice.
Well, Gavin didn’t trust his whole fucking body now, because it hadn’t been Zach leaning in, gobbling up the space betweenthem. Gavin had been right there, not even caring that it was insane to be doing this.
That it wasn’t a betrayal of everything he . . .that he . . . Gavin shut that thought off with a relentless thud.
Never to be examined again.
“Let me get you some blankets,” Gavin said, lifting himself off the couch.
“Not sure I’m gonna need them. It’s . . .uh . . .a warm night.”
Gavin flushed, glad he’d already turned away so Zach wouldn’t see. He was hot too, sweaty palms, moisture trickling down his back, just from sitting too close on a couch.
“It can get cold at night.” He crossed over to the chest, pulled out two blankets that he often used deep in the winter when he cuddled up alone on the couch and didn’t feel like dragging himself all the way to the bedroom. He set them on the far end of the couch—as far away from Zach as he could manage.
“There’s a bathroom, through. Spare toothbrush, in the drawer,” Gavin said, gesturing towards the bathroom door. He could hear the fear, the panic in his voice. “If you need anything . . .”Don’t need anything. Don’t come to my bed.Please God, no.
But Zach only nodded slowly. “I’m sure I’ll be fine,” he said.
There was no other word for it. He couldn’t even pretend it wasn’t something it absolutely fucking was. Gavinescaped, closing the bedroom door behind him. Leaning against it, breathing heavily.
What the fuck had just happened? What had he nearly done?
And now Zach would be there in the morning, sleepy and warm, on Gavin’s couch.
Gavin nearly groaned.
Ithadto be better in the morning. With the bright sunlight exposing everything, making it impossible for him to feel that way again.
He’d get up early. Set an alarm. Make breakfast. Keep the counter between them. Feed Zach and then send him on his merry way with a firm no.
Chapter 3
“Youevergoingtotell me how it went?” Hayes asked lazily, shoving a hand through his damp hair, leaving it sticking straight up in little wet spikes.
They were in Hayes’ outside pool, soaking up the sun.
Zach had been here in Florida nearly six hours, and he was impressed that Hayes had waited that long to ask.
“I . . .there’s nothing to say,” Zach said, even though that was the biggest lie he’d ever told his best friend.
