Page 84 of Colt
“So the person you’re with is not a good time,” Sarah asks.
“I’m by myself,” she responds.
“Here to see one of the guys ride?”
“You know,” she lifts her nose in the air, “I don’t really care who wins. And there is a likelihood someone could have a terrible accident, just like you.”
There’s bitterness underlying her tone. I recognize it because I’m pretty damn sure I did that to Allison.
“Is it Maverick Quinn?” Sarah asks, and we all turn to look at her.
“No,” Dallas and I say at the same time.
“He sucks,” I say.
“He really does,” Dallas agrees.
She doesn’t say anything in response, and my stomach turns with relative horror. I pinch the bridge of my nose. “Oh God, Stella.”
Dallas shoves his hands in his pockets.
“People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones,” Sarah says, looking at Colt.
“Excuse me? What did I do?”
“You know what you did,” she says.
“I… Wow, Sarah.”
“Whatever,” Stella says. I shouldn’t have even come. He got me tickets when he qualified. But then things were different. Or maybe, things were… I don’t know.” Her eyes filled with tears. She blinks them away, and it’s awful, looking at this. This kind of heartbreak. Because I feel it. Deep down inside of myself. Stella is a wonderful woman, and he’s not worth shit. That much is clear. He’s a jerk, he’s older than we are, unfriendly to absolutely everybody. Arrogant. He’s like me, but if I chose to use my powers for evil rather than good. He has dark charisma. That’s undeniable. But I thought that Stella knew better than to get tangled up with somebody like him. I guess that’s the problem.
When you want somebody, you don’t know better. You deliberately decide not to know better.
I think that’s what Allison did with me. I can’t say that I’ve done much better for myself. I wanted what I wanted, even though I couldn’t follow through.
“Any guy who fumbles you is an idiot,” Sarah says decisively.
Stella snorts. “I think I’m the idiot. For getting overly involved with a man who stated up front that he was going to fumble me. Without getting into the details.”
“I’m here for details,” says Sarah.
Dallas and I look at each other.
I don’t really want to think about Stella getting hot and heavy with Maverick Quinn. I hate that guy. Also, she’s actually like a sister to me. In a way, Allison certainly never was.
I went and made my life way too complicated. Why are feelings complicated?
I growl at that internal thought. Because they are. And I don’t like them. They just hurt.
I’ve had enough pain. A whole gut full of it.
Stella and Sarah are whispering, and pretty soon it’s time for Stella to go find her seat.
“I have a seat in the box,” Stella says. “Motherfucker couldn’t take those tickets back. Just everything else. See you guys later.”
She leaves, a hard edge to her defiant smile. It’s very her that she’s here no matter what.
I never saw Stella have a relationship, not in all the years I knew her on the circuit.
