Page 55 of So That Happened
Abi chuckled. ‘Youcanbe a bit fierce sometimes.’
Josie sighed. ‘Yeah.’ She squirmed inside as she remembered how stern she’d been with Connor when he’d first shown up. And how little it had affected him.
‘Well, I’m glad a holiday helped.’
Before she could check herself, Josie blurted, ‘I met Connor at the farmhouse.’
Abigail became very still.
‘He arrived a few days into my holiday and needed somewhere to stay.’
Abi turned to look at her, her dark eyes roving Josie’s face. ‘I’m sorry. His lawyers said he was in South America.’ Her voice wobbled a little and her eyes flicked down to her lap. ‘How is he?’
Josie regretted her insensitivity. The mention of Connor’s name clearly had Abi rattled.
‘He’s fine,’ she said, careful to keep any emotion out of her voice.
Stubborn and emotionally stunted, but physically finewas what she really wanted to say. In fact, he was more than fine. Her skin warmed at the memory of his strong body holding her close. A blush crept up her neck and she willed it not to reach her face and give her away.
‘What happened? Did he let you stay?’ Abi asked, obviously fighting to keep her cool in the face of the unexpected bombshell.
‘Yeah, after a bit of negotiation. He’s a tough cookie, your brother.’
‘Tell me about it.’ The pain in Abi’s eyes confirmed exactly how she felt about him. ‘Did he… say anything about me?’
‘Uh…’ she began tentatively.
Should she really be telling Abi this? No was the honest answer, but she wanted to hear Abigail’s side of it. To make sense of it all. She had to know the other side of the story or it would eat away at her for ever.
‘He did tell me a bit about the rift between you both.’
Abigail looked at her sharply. ‘What did he say?’
‘Well, he was cagey about it, but he insinuated that you went back on your word to you grandma and gave your inheritance to your parents, then threatened that if he didn’t do the same, he’d never be welcome in the family again.’ She kept her voice light, as if suggesting she didn’t believe a word of it.
She so wanted to know that it hadn’t happened like that. She needed to hear something negative about Connor to give her a reason to believe he wasn’t as perfect as he seemed. A way to ease the torment of missing him.
Abigail sighed and dropped her head into her hands, rubbing them across her face. Finally lifting her head, she looked Josie full in the face, her eyes filled with pain. ‘All totally true, I’m afraid.’
Josie was floored. She’d never expected Abigail just to own up to it in such a straightforward manner. Surely there had to be more to it than that? She waited for her friend to continue, her fingers tapping nervously on her legs.
Abi took a deep breath before answering. ‘I was really jealous of his relationship with our grandmother. They got on so well and I always felt left out.’
She looked away, her gaze skirting around the room, finally returning to a spot on the floor in front of her.
‘I was really unhappy as a child. Our parents didn’t give us much attention and I took out my anger on the people closest to me: Connor and my grandma.’ She rubbed a hand across her forehead. ‘I used to try to get Connor into trouble all the time – just for some attention, I guess – and he hated me for it. Anyway, when our grandma died, she left us her inheritance – gave most of it to Connor and a small amount to me. It nearly destroyed me at the time. It was proof that she loved Connor more than me and I didn’t know how to handle that feeling.’
Her voice broke on the last word, and she paused for a few seconds to regain her poise.
Josie put a reassuring hand on her arm, her heart sinking with wretchedness for her friend.
‘Then the opportunity to help our parents came up,’ Abigail continued when she’d steadied herself. ‘They needed a huge cash injection to keep their business alive and suddenly I was of interest to them. I felt wanted – needed – for the first time in my life. I’m ashamed to say I gave in straight away and promised them the money. I was still furious with Connor and I tried blackmailing him into giving up his share too. He refused, and I helped my parents kick him out of the family.’
Her eyes filled with tears.
‘I’m not proud of what I did. I wish I could take it back and make everything right with us again. But he’s not interested in talking to me any more. I’ve tried so many times over the years to get him to speak to me I’ve lost count. But I can’t really blame him for not wanting anything to do with me.’ She brushed a tear angrily away from her face. ‘Connor always handled things so much better than me. I was a mess. Still am, really.’ She smiled sadly through her tears.
He was a handler, Josie realised. Clearly, he’d been doing it all his life, and the thought of allowing someone else to dictate how he felt or reacted or suffered was too much for him. It was safer and easier to be alone, with only himself to manage. She could comprehend that. Not that it meant losing him hurt any less, but it helped her to be able to understand why she couldn’t have him. It wasn’t a failure in her; it was an inability to trust in him.
