Page 51 of So That Happened
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As they lay recovering, their bodies pressed closely together on the sofa, Josie was horrified to find her throat tight from trying to suppress a deep sob from escaping. Her eyes burned with unshed tears and her stomach clenched with sadness.
No, no, no.
This wasn’t supposed to happen. This was supposed to be fun, emotion-free sex to get her mojo back. A treat.
He’d been angry with her for asking about continuing this fling when she’d promised she wouldn’t, and that had been unemotional I-don’t-want-to-talk-about-this sex. A way of telling her to back off without actually saying it.
‘I’m going for a shower,’ she managed to mutter through a painfully constricted throat, extracting herself from Connor’s heavy limbs and readjusting her skirt to at least partly cover herself.
Her movements were jerky and uncoordinated, and her hands shook as she flattened her hair against her head. She didn’t look at him and left the room before he had a chance to comment on how strung-out she was.
By the time she’d finished showering she felt almost normal again.
Almost.
She had to pull herself together. She couldn’t go back to work in a worse state than when she’d left – how could she ever explain that to Abi? It was bad enough that she’d had sex with her friend’s brother; she definitely couldn’t take her emotional distress back to impact on her already shaky relationship with the staff. This was exactly why she shouldn’t have let anything develop with him.
It was time to leave.
If she didn’t go now, she’d never make it out with her heart intact.
Going into the bedroom, she found Connor dressing in jeans and a soft black cotton T-shirt that stretched across his massive shoulders and hugged the contoured muscles of his arms. Her heart lurched at the sight. God, she was going to miss his amazing body.
‘What is it?’ His voice was gruff.
Josie took a breath. Why was she so nervous about saying it? She was sure it would mean nothing to him if she left. In fact, he’d probably be pleased to have his solitude back.
‘I have to get back to London. I can’t leave Abi to handle everything any longer. She must be run ragged by now.’
Connor just looked at her, his expression unreadable. He nodded. ‘Right.’ His hands were clenching and unclenching at his sides. He looked away, through the window at the darkening night sky.
‘So you can have your house back.’
‘Great.’
Ask me not to go, she begged him silently. She needed to know this had meant something to him, that she wasn’t just some diversion. Not that she had any right to expect that. She’d been using him too, hadn’t she?
Connor turned to face her. She stood there rigidly, not sure what to do or say next. He walked towards her and she tensed in anticipation. Stopping directly in front of her, he placed a finger under her chin and tipped it up so her gaze met his.
‘Is that really why you’re leaving?’
‘You know it’s not.’
‘Then don’t go.’
Connor’s demand both pleased and shocked her. She looked at him in disbelief, excitement bubbling in her stomach. ‘What are you asking me?’
‘Stay here with me for one more week. It’s my birthday next Saturday. Help me celebrate.’
Her heart sank. He only wanted a few more days. Nothing more. ‘I didn’t think you’d be the type to celebrate birthdays.’
‘I’m not usually.’
She looked away from him, barely holding it together. ‘I can’t. My sister’s up for a Best Presenter award that weekend and I promised to go and support her.’
She’d had no intention of actually going when Maddie had asked her – she found those things excruciating to sit through on her own, being ignored while people fawned over her sister – but after talking to Connor about her it somehow seemed to matter less now. The tight ball of angst she carried round with her had shrunk to a manageable size. And it was as good an excuse as any.
