Page 50 of Here Comes Trouble
She should have told him how she felt.
If she’d learnt anything over the last couple of weeks it was that she needed to put herself out there, to open herself up to new experiences if she wanted the opportunity for something good to happen. She couldn’t just sit back any more, with her head in the sand and wait for things to happen to her.
Pamela finally came back after a couple more days off sick and Jess waited, nerves jumping, to be summoned into her office.
‘Well, Jess, I’ve read your piece on Xander Heaton,’ Pamela said as Jess perched carefully on the edge of the seat facing the editor’s desk. She somehow managed a smile despite her jaw being clenched with anxiety.
She just wanted it to be over with so she could move forward. If Pamela still thought she couldn’t cut it atSparkand she had to go back home and start again she wanted time to come to terms with the toe-curling horror of it.
‘Well, you did it, you impressed me,’ Pam said, and Jess felt a lightness in her chest battle with the heaviness that had been keeping her company since she left Italy. ‘This is exactly the kind of writing I’d been hoping to see. I don’t know what happened out there, but whatever it was it’s had a big effect on your style. I like it Jess, well done.’
It was a big deal to her to hear that kind of praise from someone as tough as Pamela, and her eyes welled with grateful tears.
‘So I get to keep my job here?’ she asked breathlessly.
‘Absolutely,’ Pam replied.
Jess breathed a huge sigh of relief. At least that part of her life was on the right track again.
‘The only thing it needs before it can go in the magazine is a mention of what he’s working on at the minute,’ Pamela said, as Jess began to stand up, thinking she was home and dry.
She went hot, then cold in the space of a second. ‘I-I don’t k-know what he was working on,’ she stammered, ‘He never let me see his work in progress. He was really insistent about that.’
The look of displeasure on Pamela’s face made her stomach sink.
‘Well, you’ll just have to tell him you have a couple of follow-up questions. See if you can get a gander at the pictures while you’re there,’ her boss said flippantly, as if that would be the easiest thing in the world. ‘Otherwise we can’t publish it. It’s an unfinished piece.’
Jess’s chest felt tight and her lungs seemed to be having trouble drawing in air.
‘From the tone of the article it sounded like you got to know him pretty well,’ Pamela continued, clearly completely oblivious to Jess’s concerns about revealing more about his work than Xander would want her to. She raised a discerning eyebrow. ‘Use your influence, Jess.’
‘You want me to go all the way back to Italy to find out what he’s working on?’ she said, desperately, hoping this would dissuade Pam from making her go back, cap in hand.
Pam gave her a withering look. ‘Don’t you follow his feed? He’s back in London. Although I’ve heard he’s been leaving parties early for once instead of indulging in his usual bad behaviour, which is rather intriguing.’
‘Xander’s b-back in London?’ Jess managed to stutter through frozen lips.
When she’d thought he was still in Italy it had been easier to keep her heartache under wraps, but it felt as if he was close enough to touch now – close, yet still so far away.
Pam sighed and looked at her as if she thought she was talking to a total idiot. ‘Yes, Jess. So get your backside over to his studio and find out what we need to know so I can put this issue to bed.’
Oh, God.He was never going to agree to tell her. But perhaps she could get a very general idea about the theme of the exhibition out of him, somehow. That wouldn’t be revealing too much.
Would it?
Sliding off her chair and standing up on jelly-like legs, Jess gave her editor a stiff nod. ‘Okay, Pam, I’ll see what I can do.’
* * *
Jess stood outside the door to Xander’s studio, her body quivering with nerves and her heart in her mouth.
She had no idea how she was going to play this. She also didn’t know how he was going to react when he saw her again. They hadn’t exactly parted on bad terms, but there hadn’t been a fond farewell either.
Perhaps this was fate, or serendipity, or whatever you wanted to call it, handing her an opportunity. Perhaps when he saw her, he’d realise they were meant to be together and ask her not to leave again.
Perhaps.
Only one way to find out.
