Page 39 of Best Mistake Ever
‘And some people only want to be associated with you for the reflected glory they think comes with it,’ he goes on. ‘Especially partners. It turned out Tessa was like that. My ex. Trouble is, that shit can make you paranoid about whether people are sticking around because they genuinely care about you,’ he says, his gaze flicking to mine momentarily, before he looks away again. ‘I’ve come to realise over the years that people are perfectly happy to be fake to your face if they think there’s something in it for them. I can’t stand disingenuous hangers-on.’
I catch the flash of pain on his face and hot guilt rushes through me at the thought that he might consider me to be one of those people right now. I’m not doing it to leech off him though, but to help navigate a messed-up situation for my sister.
And I’m not looking to start a romantic relationship with him either. It sounds like he’s not in the market for one anyway, if he’s freshly out of a messy break-up.
‘But then I felt like I was playing a part a lot of the time with her,’ he adds. ‘Though I guess most of us would say that about life in general. I just wish people could be straight with each other; it would save us all a lot of pain.’
I can feel my face getting hot as my discomfort about my and Dee’s ruse increases. The more I’m getting to know Jonah, the worse I’m feeling about not being entirely honest with him.
‘Jay seems really pleased with the way the festival’s going, anyway,’ I say to change the subject, so I don’t get myself caught in any more knots. The more Jonah tells me about himself, the worse I’m going to feel when I have to walk away from him and relay all his secrets to Dee. ‘I wouldn’t be surprised if he asks to book here for the one he runs in the summer and perhaps hold the winter one here next year too,’ I add.
Jonah seems to think about this, still gazing into the flames, then nods. ‘All credit to you. Having the festival here was a great idea, but it’s not going to be regular enough to keep the place profitable over the off season. We need to work on a more sustainable business model if I’m going to keep it running as a hotel and venue.’
‘Can I ask: what were your plans when you first took it over? Other than accommodating guests and weddings here?’ I ask. ‘And do you have any ideas for the sorts of things you’d like to expand into if you decide not to give the place up?’
‘Well, when I first got here, I toyed with the idea of starting a cider-making business on the site. The orchard is already well established and the fruit mostly goes to waste year on year. But I’ve not had a chance to develop it as an idea yet; I’ve been too bogged down with running the hotel on my own.’
‘Cider? Huh. You know what, that could really work. There’s a place quite nearby that’s doing that. You should check it out. It’s just a bit further into Somerset, near Bruton. The Newt, do you know it?’
‘I’ve heard of it, yeah, but I’ve never visited.’
‘You should. It’s wonderful. You could also do tours around the press and hold some tasting sessions. People love to give those sorts of things as birthday experiences. There’s lots you could do. There’s another boutique hotel quite nearby here – my dad took us there for a meal recently – it’s about the same size as this place and it’s set up really well. That place would definitely be worth a recon visit if you’ve not already been.’
‘You’re just full of good ideas at the moment, aren’t you? What’s going on? Have you been keeping them all under your hat till now so you can bring them out at the right moment and dazzle me with them?’
‘Are you dazzled?’ I ask, hoping to divert him from the fact Dee and I clearly have very different approaches to this job.
‘A little bit, yeah.’
I shrug. ‘Well, I’m just trying to help. I’d hate to see this place fail and I really don’t want to lose my job. I like it here,’ I say, telling myself I’m channelling Dee right now, so it’s not technically lying. It’s disseminating information by proxy.
‘Yeah. Well, it likes you too. I’m impressed. Really.’
Heat rises to my cheeks. ‘Thanks. That’s good to hear.’
There’s a small pause where we both stare at the dancing flames of the fire.
‘Why don’t you come with me to that place you were talking about on Monday, once the festival’s wrapped up and they’ve all left?’ he says, making me start. ‘We can take notes on what they’re doing there and start working up a plan for how to emulate it here. I’d really appreciate your thoughts on it.’
‘Oh. Er…’ I’m desperately trying to think of an excuse, but nothing immediately springs to mind. I’m supposed to be ‘twisting my ankle’ on Monday morning, to follow Dee’s plan for re-integrating when she eventually makes it home, but the idea of spending one more day with Jonah is too much of a lure. I can have my ‘accident’ in the evening after our trip. ‘Yes, okay. That’s a great idea,’ I say, before I can stop myself.
It’s only one more day. And I’d really like to be able to help in any way I can at this point. He’s clearly a good guy who’s been struggling to keep all his plates spinning on his own.
‘Great. Let’s plan to meet in the car park at one o’clock. The circus will have left by then, right?’
‘Yes, they’re aiming to start striking the site first thing and be away by midday. So even if we give them a bit of grace to run over, we should be free to leave by one.’
‘Good. It’s a date,’ His brow creases. ‘I mean, that’s a plan.’
He stands up and brushes little flakes of ash from the fire off the front of his jumper. ‘Right, well I’m going to head back to my place now then. Night.’
‘Night,’ I say to his retreating figure.
He doesn’t turn to look at me again. Instead, he disappears into the darkness, leaving me staring after him, my mind a chaos of conflicting thoughts.
12
JONAH
