Page 63 of Three's a Crowd
‘Okay.’ She nodded miserably. She knew he had to go; there was nothing left for him to stay for now. Deep down, she’d known too that their relationship had run its course a while ago. ‘Where will you go?’
‘Suzie said I can move in with her.’ He paused for a moment and seemed to gather himself, even though tears were flowing freely down his face now. ‘Bye, Daisy,’ he said more gently now, reminding her with a pang of sadness of the old Adam. ‘I’ll come round for my things next week when you’re at work.’
With that, he walked out, closing the front door quietly but firmly behind him.
15
Life felt very hard for a while.
Daisy took some leave from work and went to stay with her parents for a couple of weeks. It was so lovely to be looked after, like being a child again.
Her parents were obviously very worried about the state she was in. They’d tried to talk to her about what had happened but she was too ashamed and confused to tell them anything other than the sketchiest of details.
They were obviously very fond of Adam and sad to hear that they’d split up, but they assured her that her wellbeing was their top priority.
Even with this reassurance, she wasn’t able to relate the whole sorry tale without bursting into tears, so they left her alone, clearly counting on her telling them when she was good and ready.
She spent her time there picking at the delicious meals her mother put in front of her, her appetite all but gone. She felt tired all the time and often retired to her bed early, sinking into the soft mattress, relieved at getting through one more day.
She mostly managed to block all thoughts of what had happened with Zach and Adam out of her mind, but occasionally, they would creep back in again and she would be overwhelmed by an ache of pain-tinged nostalgia, and a yearning for things to return to how they’d been, so strong, it would take her breath away.
But she knew there was no chance of that ever happening.
Arriving back home to London, she was upset to find the flat empty of Adam’s things. But after having a good, hard, power cry, she started to feel a new sense of purpose sweep through her. It was time to change things up and move on.
Taking a steadying breath, she walked around the flat, mentally planning the things she would buy for it when she had the money – which probably wouldn’t be for a while since she’d only just be able to cover the rent on her own for the time being. But if she got the pay rise at work that Jez had promised her, it could all be entirely her own choice, she realised. She wouldn’t have to defer to anyone else’s tastes or budget concerns.
There was something quite heartening about that.
As time went on, she found it was nice not to have to worry about what sort of mood Adam would be in when he came home from work, or to feel the ever-present weight of guilt whenever she looked at him.
Having never lived alone before, she found it was actually quite fun re-arranging the furniture and doing things like painting the walls, just for herself to appreciate for a change.
And the house was so much tidier without Adam in it.
But it didn’t stop her from missing him.
Daisy was in the studio at the radio station, editing an interview, when Claire barged into the room.
‘You still here?’ her friend asked in surprise. ‘You should have gone home ages ago.’
After a few months of living on her own, the initial excitement of it had started to wear off and Daisy had been staying later and later at work in order to avoid going home to an empty house in the evenings.
‘Yeah, I know, I’m just going to finish this, then I’m going.’ She waved a hand at the screen.
Claire looked at her for a moment, her face set in a deep frown.
‘I’m worried about you, Daisy. We all are,’ she said quietly. ‘You’ve lost all your sparkle.’
She perched on the desk next to her and looked at her steadily. ‘You’ve got to start going out again. It’s not good for you to keep yourself locked away like this. Sorry to be harsh, but you’ve got to stop wallowing. It’s been months now and you’re still punishing yourself.’
Daisy had filled her in on the whole sorry tale soon after it had happened and Claire had been kind and understanding at first, but clearly now felt more drastic action was needed to coerce her friend out of her reclusive stupor.
‘Look, I’ve been invited to this swanky media party on Friday at the Longe Lounge in Soho. I can get you onto the guest list. Come with me. We can have a few cocktails, flirt with some hot guys, it’ll be good for you.’ She leaned closer and waggled her eyebrows. ‘I won’t take no for an answer!’ she finished bossily, cutting off Daisy’s reply before she could refuse her.
Daisy slumped back into her seat in defeat, no match for her friend’s determination.
‘Okay.’ She pointed a finger at her. ‘But only to make you happy.’
