Page 6 of The Blue Rose
I walk towards the house and call Jess, who answers after the first ring. Hearing my cries, all she says is, “I’m on my way.” Hanging up, I fall to the ground and let the grief of losing my father for good take over me.
THREE
SERENA
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Jess shouts while shoving another chocolate chip cookie in her mouth. “The audacity of that fucking piece of shit.”
The crumbs fall onto her shirt, and I reach over and brush them away. She looks down, and gives me an appreciative smile. Cookies are her kryptonite. She is a health nut, but when it comes to her favorite cookies, she can’t say no.
“I know,” I sniffle. “I don’t know what I was expecting, but-” I wipe away the tears streaking down my cheeks. “I just… I wasn’t expecting this” I try to collect myself, failing until Jessica wraps me in her arms, and brushes her hand down my hair.
She takes a deep breath, “Shhh, I’m right here, he didn’t deserve you when you lost your mom, and he sure as shit doesn’t deserve you now.”
My breathing becomes erratic, her words helping heal the reopened wound in my chest. “I know, I just thought... Shit I don’t even know what I thought.”
I thought that after being estranged for so long my father wanted to start to rebuild the bridge he tore down. That he wanted to be a family again. That I could be his little girl again.That will never happen.
She starts to rub my back, concern etched on her face, she says. “You thought that after five years of being absent this was his way of trying to rekindle what he broke.”
I look up at her with a snot filled face. “I mean, after the email exchanges, and him degrading my career choice, I should have known better”. Jessica hands me a tissue, and I attempt a watery smile before blowing into it. “I don’t know Jess, I just wish that tonight would’ve gone better, instead of turning into this mess.”
She wipes the blotched mascara running down my face and pushes the hair that came loose from my bun away from my eyes. “You know, the night isn’t over yet.” she says with a devilish smile. “In fact, the night is still young, and I say we do what we haven’t done in awhile”
I smile a little, because I know exactly what she is thinking, it’s the same thing Jess always suggests when one of us is having a bad day. Although I feel like it is always for me. I swear Jessica never has any bad days.
“We haven’t done that for a hot minute because people always look at us weird, mostly me, when we go out.” I whisper looking down at my hands. But it’s true, everytime I go out with Jessica, the stares we get are looks of confusion or pity. Always directed at me, which makes me feel uncomfortable and even more insecure than I already feel standing next to her.
She pulls me to my feet, grabbing my shoulders and, placing me right in front of her, a wicked smile on her face. “Time to let the devil out”.
“Speaking of the devil, did you see the Morbid Monet, struck again?”
She lets me go, “You seriously need to stop obsessing over that psycho.”
“I know, but I can’t there's just something about his work.” I say with a dazed face.
“Work!? Serena, he kills women, who, no offense,” she motions up and down, “Have your body type. That isn’t work, he needs to be locked up.”
Ouch.
I sigh, knowing I need to pick my battles wisely with Jess. This is one battle I know I will lose, so I nod my head in defeat, and we head to my room so I can get ready all over again.
I look over at my best friend, her eyes a beautiful shade of honey brown, her blonde, wavy hair cascading all the way down to her lower back. She smiles at me, emphasizing her cute button nose and small lips. Lips that she makes look bigger using lip liner and lipstick. I force a smile back, trying to shrug off the jealousy I feel. Jess is who everyone, including me, wishes they looked like.
She riffles through my closet, pulling out a tight black dress that stretches to fit any body type. With wide eyes, I shake my head no, she frowns, but puts it away with a sigh. Jess has always said I need to own my curves, but that’s hard to do, since I want to hide away from the world tonight. She goes back to rifling through my closet, and I turn and sit down at my little black vanity. Turning to face the mirror, I lean over the table, my breast pressing against it, I start putting on my fake cat eye eyelashes.
She screams, making me jump out of my skin, nearly poking my eyes out when she excitedly yells. “This is perfect, Serena you have,” she says the words with extra enunciation, “-To wear this tonight.”
Turning around, my eyebrows raise at the red dress that is dangling from her hand. “Yeah, no, I am not wearing that- it is skin tight, and I do not want to show off every roll I have.”
She stalks towards me, raises her right hand and smacks me on the back of my head. Rubbing the now sore spot, I glare at her through the mirror. She ignores my glare and protest and says,“Bitch you are fucking beautiful, and this dress was made for those curves- at least try it on before you say no.” She sticks out her bottom lip, makes her already big eyes bigger, and shoves the dress towards me.
I look at the dress, then her pleading face, roll my eyes, and reluctantly grab it from her. “Fine, but if I look like a beached whale, I’m just going to wear what I had on.”
She starts clapping and jumping up and down, excited that she won this round. Then eyes the baby blue dress lying on my bed in disgust, walks over and holds it with two fingers away from her body. “That does not scream ‘let the devil out,’ this-.” She motions to the red dress I’m slipping over my head. “Screams Lucifers play thing, and the world needs to bow at your feet, in reverence.”
She walks over to me and zips me up. I eye myself in the mirror, stunned at the person staring back at me. “I guess, I could be worshiped for one night.”
Jessica smacks my ass, making me jump, “That’s the spirit!”
