Page 11 of Goblins Don't Count
“Hey, Rynnie. You wanna come in for a drink? The boss would pay you better than Jossy. She’d even give you a free parking pass.”
“But it would be the parking garage I already use. Also, I’m not bouncer material.”
She snorted and flexed her enormous arms, the red skin stretched taut over the rippling muscles. Her tail and horns were typical demon accoutrements, but she was particularly large. She said she was part ogre, and no one argued with her. “Not a bouncer, Rynnie. You’d be a dancer.”
I snorted and then broke out laughing. “Wow. Yeah, I’m just full of grace and beauty. The only time I’m dancing, I’m also undercover and would end up arresting every pervert who touched me if I didn’t taser them first.” I winced. I really shouldn’t have tasered Sashimi.
She leaned closer, looking interested. “There’s a story there.”
I hurried past her, shaking my head. “You should join the force. Then it’d be a real force.” I waved at her as she laughed her throaty bellow.
“Sure! Once you take over, I’ll sign up first thing. No way I could work for a man like Jossy. Then again, he’s not bad looking. I could kidnap him, keep him as a pet, maybe make a dancer out of him.”
I kept walking, although the image of blustering Lieutenant Joss in a scant dancing outfit was extremely disturbing. A white-haired guy veered into me, or he would have if I didn’t dodge out of his way. He ran into the building instead.
I sighed, readjusted my bag and walked faster. By the time I reached the station, I was feeling more in control.
I smiled at Lewell, who stood at the door, looking serious and professional in his uniform, all except for the streak of frosting on his chin.
“Morning Sato. Joss is looking for you. You left a goblin in the cell overnight?”
I flashed a smile and continued quickly into the station. I walked past the front area where a guy in handcuffs was yelling about owning the streets because he paid taxes, so he could do whatever he wanted there, whether it involved all of his clothing or not. So glad that wasn’t my case today. I went to Lieutenant Joss’s office and knocked even though the door was open.
“Good morning! How’s everyone?” I asked brightly, glancing around at Lieutenant Joss, who was red-faced and chewing a stick of licorice like crazy, as he did since he’d given up smoking. Brannigan was there, frowning over my handcuffs, while Sashimi sat on the couch. No, the goblin lounged, looking relaxed and comfortable in spite of the cuffs on his wrists, and the fact that he’d spent the night on a wooden bench.
“Sato, take off the cuffs,” Lieutenant Joss said, gesturing at the goblin.
“Sir, he’s an intruder. He broke into the building last night, and if I hadn’t been there, he would have done who knows what? He could have broken into the armory, or stolen files, or…”
“Sato! I hired Corcarn to check our security! That is, it was a city initiative, paid for by the people’s taxes. He’s the best in the business, and you’re saying…”
I interrupted. “If he’s so good, why was it so easy for me to take him out? He wasn’t nearly stealthy enough. I heard him from down the hall climbing in the window.”
Lieutenant Joss glowered at me.
“She’s an asset to the force,” Sashimi said, giving me a look of pure mischief. He was having fun with this? Yes. He absolutely was. “Who else could capture Corcarn? None, but you, Rynne Sato with your keen hearing, and whiplash reflexes, who can defeat even a notorious former thief such as myself. You should be commended.”
Brannigan snorted and moved away from the couch. “Commended or committed? Who makes cuffs that can’t be removed?”
I edged closer to Sashimi, studying him suspiciously before I crouched down and focused on the cuffs. I took the key out of Brannigan’s hands, but they weren’t coming off.
I looked up to scowl at Sashimi. “Did you do something to them?”
“That was Brannigan. He may have damaged the lock with his brute strength.”
I sighed heavily and straightened, trying to not feel bad for putting cuffs on Sashimi that were not functioning, that I’d made, and which were so incredibly ugly. Also for mistaking Sashimi for a criminal. Also tasering him. Had he actually been honest with me the whole time? Who hires a goblin to break into something? The whole world was insane.
“After you get those cuffs off him, Sato, I need you to write that report on the judge’s death again,” Lieutenant Joss said, scowling at the cuffs and then at me.
“Wait, what? Why?” I asked, heart sinking. I’d spent hours on that report and had done my very best.
“Judge Stevens killed himself. Your entire report is focused on the possibility of murder, even though it’s not possible. You need to write something unbiased.”
“But assuming it was suicide is biased. I wrote down the facts, nothing more, nothing less. All of my interviews…”
“Were filled with leading questions,” he said, cutting me off. He ran a hand through his hair. “I’m not going to make you do new interviews, just summarize them with more neutral wording. I need us to work as a team to clear up any confusion around this case.”
“But…”
