Page 553 of Forbidden Billionaires: Vol. 7
OPEN ME AT MIDNIGHT
The fact that it hadn’t been written with random newspaper cutouts felt like a win. But also:Hell to the no!What kind of sick torture was this? If the Emerald Oasis Eviscerator thought I’d have the patience to wait two hours to open this, then he was insane. Then again, I already figured he was insane since he was a serial killer, so I guess that kind of tracked.
Yeah, I’m not waiting, asshole.I tore into the wrapping paper. At the same time, a horrible realization washed over me. If this package exploded, my final words will have been: “P.S. I almost got spit roasted tonight.”
Fuck my life.
I braced for impact as the last bits of wrapping paper fell away from the package. But nothing happened. Inside was a normal brown box. It wasn’t taped shut or anything, though, so the flaps sprung open to reveal…another package.
Actually, it was a heavy-duty safe. Like, one of those metal ones trimmed with blue neon lights that a rich dude would hide behind a Van Gogh in his home office. And there was a sticky note slapped on top:
Bad girl! I said to wait until midnight!
Now I’m going to have to punish you ;)
What the hell!? How did the murderer know that I’d open the first package early? And why was the tone of this second note so playful?
It was possible that the winky face meant that they were going to peel my skin off with a butter knife while forcing me to listen to Nickelback’s greatest hits on a never-ending loop, but I was getting more of a sexy vibe. Which meant…
The package was from Tanner! Which made sense. He knew I liked to open things early when I was specifically told not to. Like when I opened hisjust in case he disappearedletter the second after I got it. Patience was not one of my virtues.
Was this why he had run away? If so, it better be freaking amazing. And the only gift amazing enough to make me forgive him was his penis. Although I hoped he hadn’t chopped it off and put it in the safe. That would be disturbing. I’d rather the contents of the safe be somehow related to Tanner wanting to take me somewhere romantic for our first time.
Yup, that was the only thing I wanted in the safe.
Actually, that wasn’t true. I would also be satisfied if Tanner had run off because he’d seen an adorable pregnant squirrel with the fluffiest tail and chubbiest cheeks in the whole world who loves being squeezed, and if said squirrel had been magically tamed to be my life-long snuggle companion.
Either one of those two things would be fine.
Although if it was the second one, I definitely needed to get some food. Because I was desperately hungry, and I didn’t want toaccidentally go into a hunger rage and eat Captain Nutsmuggler when he popped out of the safe at midnight. Not that I really thought that was going to happen. But a girl can dream. About receiving him. Not eating him.
I pushed the safe into my room and then slipped into my new panda pajamas. Usually I would have been mortified to be seen in public in such pajamas, but this was the Society. I’d just MCed a spit roast in front of these people. If anything, going back to the party in a conservative set of panda pajamas was just the sort of thing I needed to do to prove to everyone that I wasn’t a huge slut. Maybe it would swing the pendulum a bit too far in the direction of total loser, but I was so hungry that I frankly did not care.
Anyway…the only society member’s opinion I cared about was Tanner’s. And if he packed those pajamas, then he must have thought they were totes adorbs.
I was super confident in my outfit choice right up until I pulled up to the party in my golf cart and realized that a hundred real humans were about to see me.
Whatever.That roasted pork was calling my name. The fat dripped off and crackled in the flames as the pig spun and spun. The enchanting aroma of bacon was completely irresistible. There was no way I was turning back now. I’d been dreaming of this moment for years.
I walked right up to the chef manning the fire pit and asked him to slice me off a piece of pork. And then I asked for seconds and thirds. And fourths. Fine! And fifths. Don’t judge me. I was hungry AF, and I was still the princess of this damned party.As far as I was concerned, I was being a benevolent princess by leaving any pork for my loyal subjects…who were all completely ignoring me.
The spit roast had continued despite my absence. How in the world were they still going at it? Joe had never lasted more than 4 minutes and 23 seconds - don’t ask why I knew that exact number - so it was shocking to see that Angel and Diablo werestillrailing Chastity with the same vigor as when I’d left.
My fanny flutters immediately returned. I couldn’t help it. I’d finally experienced an orgasm. And now I needed one at least every ten minutes. Was this what tween boys felt when they first discovered they could jerk off? I ate more meat as I stared at the stage.
Yeah…Tanner better be planning to bang the hell out of me at midnight.His fingers had been amazing. I could barely even wait to see how his hard cock would feel deep inside of me. I smiled at the thought as I double-fisted my pork.
Someone finally noticed me and gave me a weird look.
Get over yourself, peasant.As if they’d never double-fisted their pork products before. #PorkLife.
I took another huge bite. It was delicious. Drool-worthy. The best meat I’d ever had. And yet…it wasn’t going to be the best meat I put in my mouth tonight.
This Is War - Chapter 33 – Visions of Sugarcocks
Saturday – September 23, 2023
Waiting for the safe to open at midnight was pure torture. It was like I was a kid on Christmas morning. Only it was neither Christmas nor morning, I was an adult, and my present was going to be a big, juicy dick.
