Page 75 of Wish I Were Here
My breath hitches. Byanyone, she meansme.
I don’t know what I expected. Of course she didn’t want a relationship, or she would have reached out years ago. She would have been there from the beginning. I’ve probably always known that it was a fantasy to think she wanted to be with me but that for some elaborate reason, she couldn’t.
Luca’s hand closes over mine.
“The thing is, Catherine,” Melanie says, crossing her hands in her lap. “I met your father in high school. He was the popular boy, the class clown, everyone loved him.”
I nod, because of course, none of this is a surprise. I saw Dad out there with Mrs. Goodwin and Uncle Vito and the book club today. I understand his gravitational pull.
“On the other hand, I was the teacher’s pet sitting in the front of the class,” Melanie continues. “The nerd. When your father took an interest in me, well—” She closes her eyes and shakes her head. “I’m afraid I got swept up in it.”
Her story isn’t completely a surprise, either. I was the teacher’s pet, sitting in the front of the class—the nerd—too. I remember how lonely it was. How lonely it can still be, sometimes. If the charming, popular guy suddenly wanted to spend time with me, would I be swept up in it, too?
With an ache in my chest, my gaze darts to Luca.
“When I found out I was pregnant, your father and I were seventeen. I had just been accepted to Harvard to start my undergraduate program in biology before applying to medical schools.”
I do some quick calculations in my head. I was born in July, which means that my mother gave birth to me a month before she started college. If she’d stuck around, she would have been going to classes with a newborn baby strapped to her back. Or maybe she wouldn’t have gone at all.
“For a while, your father and I were idealistic enough to believe we could make it work. But thank goodness, by the time you were born, we came to our senses and went our separate ways.”
Luca leans forward in his seat. “‘Thank goodness’ seems a little… strong, doesn’t it?”
Melanie turns her gaze to Luca, her blue eyes cold. “Andy was wrong for me on every level. I was planning to go to Harvard, and Andy…” Melanie raises an eyebrow. “Andy didn’t have much of a plan for his life at all. If we’d tried to make it work, we would have failed spectacularly. I might not have made it to Harvard or medical school. I certainly wouldn’t have the career that I do.”
“But you might have had Catherine in your life,” Luca points out.
Melanie turns to me, eyes softening. “I was young, and I made a choice. I hope that a woman with multiple degrees and a successful career like you can understand that.”
I nod because Idosee Melanie’s point. She worked hard for her success. Maybe she was smart to not let an ill-fated relationship and a mistake affect the rest of her life.
Even if that mistake wasme.
Next to me, Luca sighs.
Melanie looks at him for a long moment, her face impassive, but I can sense hostility beneath the surface. I’ve never seen someone so immune to his charms. Even Tonya at the Social Security office warmed up to him eventually. But then, Luca doesn’t seem very interested in charming my mother.
“What is it that you do?” she inquires in a frosty voice.
“I’m a doorman.”
“Have you ever made sacrifices for your career?”
Luca shrugs. “I don’t make sacrifices for jobs. I make sacrifices for people I care about.”
“Well, I suppose that’s where we’re different. Some of us have careers that require sacrifice.” Melanie turns to me. “And I may have missed out on your upbringing, but it seems that for all Andy’s flaws, he did an excellent job of raising you.” She gives me a smile. “And he even encouraged your intellectual pursuits.” There’s a hint of surprise in her voice, and part of me understands that, too. If I were her, I would have expected me to become a clown. “I think it’s just wonderful that you’re a college professor,” Melanie adds.
I pull my shoulders back, flushing with pride. “Thank you. That really means a lot.”
“I just hope the birth certificate will help you to sort out any of the issues you’re having with your new job.”
I clutch the file tightly. “I think it will…” But then I realize how indecisive that sounds. I’d hate for her to think I could possibly lose the position. “Actually, I’msureit will. I plan to be back at work by Monday afternoon.”
Melanie gives me a nod of approval. “Good. I’m glad we’ve sorted everything out.” There’s a note of finality in her voice, as if we’ve just ended a staff meeting and it’s time to file out in the hall.
Is this my cue to leave? I slide to the end of the couch but can’t bring myself to stand up.
Melanie stares at me. Luca clears his throat.
