Page 81 of Rarely Pure and Never Simple
Damien begged some blankets from one of the medics, and he and Blaze wrapped Shudder up, hiding his blond curls, a fold of the blanket tented over his face. Dryad simply pulled her hood up and kept her head down. Damien thanked Fox, assured him that he had vehicles waiting half a mile off, and they walked out, leaving the rest of the mess in Guild hands.
It wasn't his job to investigate the site. It was his job to find the lost, a job that he was beginning to think would never be complete.
11
ROUNDABOUT
"No. I'll go with you, and Shuds can take his own damn skimmer home when he's ready." Blaze stood in the center of the beautiful valley again, the sun unable to cut through the chill growing inside him. They'd returned Dryad home, safe and sound, and gotten Shudder resettled at the healers' house.
Damien wouldn't look at him. "Blaze, please. Head injuries are unpredictable. Shudder could have blackouts for months still. Go with him. Make sure he gets to his own people. They'll take care of him."
He waved both hands toward the valley entrance. "What are you saying? You're going now? You haven't even had a chance to catch your fucking breath."
"This afternoon. As soon as everyone who wants to go with me is ready." Damien stood from the rock he'd been sitting on and put a palm over Blaze's heart. "I can't stay here much longer. There are too many people. And it's so peaceful. Eventually, someone would forget. Come up on me the wrong way. Startle me at a bad moment. I would annihilate the peace if I stayed too long."
"Yeah." Blaze kissed the top of his head. "Me, too. Different, I know, but the bad ending would be the same. Still…"
He held Damien, not too tight since he was afraid it would scare Damien off faster. Dryad and the four kids Damien would drive to Boise and put on planes bound home straggled down the hillsides. Damien would return the much-used Raptor to the rental company there, then hop a plane for Raleigh and the necessary debrief.
"I might be a couple weeks. They say Shuds needs time before he can travel. And then it'll take a few days to get back east. Wait for me in Raleigh, all right?"
Damien didn't answer. He stood staring at the sky. Suddenly, he turned and seized Blaze by the coat lapels. "Be careful and take care of yourself. I—"
He broke off and yanked Blaze down for a bruising kiss, their lips crashing together in mutual desperation. With a soft whimper, Blaze crushed him close, terrified of letting go, knowing he had to.
Damien's eyes glistened as he pulled back. He smoothed the hair back from Blaze's forehead, kissed his cheek, and turned without another word to hike up the hill with the kids trailing him like ducklings.
Blaze stayed where he was, every step away from him driving another nail into his heart. He watched until Damien disappeared with his charges into the maw of the tunnel. The darkness swallowed him with terrible finality.
He turned away to wipe at his eyes.
"He'll be waiting for you, won't he?" Dryad asked softly.
"No." Blaze choked out. "He won't. That was him saying goodbye."
Damien staredat the wisps of steam rising from his tea. "Thank you for seeing me here instead of the office. Off the record."
Dr. Parma pulled out the kitchen chair across from him and settled with her own cup of tea. "This was your home, dear. You're always welcome here."
He nodded, taking a sip to swallow the lump in his throat. "Still. Thank you."
"You're not going to tell me everything that happened out there, are you?"
"No, ma'am. There are some things I can't. They're not mine to tell. But I will tell you, off the record, most of the children are safe, except the first two we found murdered and the four I can't get a trail on."
"So you did find more than fourteen."
"I can't tell you any more. Please don't ask me."
She nodded, always respectful of his boundaries. "I've begun an analysis of the data from the Fredamine Project. It's a shame, really. Some very useful findings but gathered in such a horrendous way."
"What were they trying to do?"
"The initial premise seems to have been to isolate why fredamine only causes successful variance in such a small percentage of the population. If it had been a legitimate medical study, I would have said the purpose was to decrease infant mortality rates in variants. Or, perhaps as an offshoot, to help alleviate some of the other neurological symptoms often associated with variance. I'm afraid their purpose wasn't anywhere near so benign."
"Sort of gathered that."
"There were several prongs to their research." She waved a hand with a disgusted moue. "The usual, I'm afraid. Weapons research. Possible power sources. The harnessing of certain talents for nonvariants. I'm sure yours would have been of particular interest to them. But they also seemed to believe there might be a link between certain types of variance, longevity, and aging. They were searching for things that would have brought them wealth and power."
