Page 63 of Rarely Pure and Never Simple
A strange shudder ran through him, hot and cold, one that reeked of premonition. Ridiculous, of course. He couldn't indulge in cobwebs and fantasies. Blaze followed right behind.
They bedded down all together again that night, Shudder managing to sit up and eat a little before the pain defeated him and he had to curl up in his makeshift bed. Damien had known him only a short while, but it was strange to see him so subdued, memories of his ebullient, stubbornly cheerful personality floating in ghostly overlay. Blaze was surprisingly gentle with Shudder, attentive and careful, his broken-glass, multi-purpose sarcasm muted to disgruntled grumbling.
For Damien, it was further proof of things Blaze had been unable to excise from his heart, no matter how vehemently he denied it. Part of Damien resented it. Part of him held tight to a bizarre cocktail of hope and despair.
Coyotes howled outside the Raptor that night, a mournful choir that somehow lulled Blaze to sleep, his head once again pillowed on Damien's shoulder. Damien remained awake for several hours, simply listening to the sounds of life around them.
The next day drew them farther into the mountains. The skimmer identified one of the larger peaks drifting mirage-like in the distance as Granite Peak, so Damien was certain they had crossed over into Montana. The old state boundaries meant so little out here, but they helped him keep his world in order, dividing the vast stretches of wilderness into manageable chunks.
Toward afternoon, they entered winter-brown meadows, the mountains still politely pacing them on either side but not hemming them in yet. When they stopped at midday for a break, Blaze handed over his scope, pointing out a bighorn sheep up on the slope. The animal—Damien had no idea of its gender—watched them with frank curiosity. When it seemed to have its fill, it turned and raced up what seemed to him a sheer cliff face. Apparently, the bighorn disagreed.
Blaze kissed the top of his head as he retrieved his scope. A tremor ran through Damien at the tender gesture.
The trails in his head led them farther into the mountains, down ever-narrower valleys and fissures. As the way narrowed, the trails multiplied. Somanyof them, headed in the same direction. The blue bowl of sky was just shading toward evening indigo when they reached a narrow canyon mouth where the skimmer couldn't pass.
When they'd parked the vehicles, Damien forced himself to count. Not five, not six, but eighteen distinct trails headed this way. Eighteen. He identified as he counted, one missing child after another. He desperately hoped that they weren't heading toward a second prison camp-laboratory facility.
But no one needed to suggest waiting until morning. The path from here would be on foot, and proceeding in the dark over potentially rough terrain would be foolhardy.
Foolhardy didn't seem to go away with the sunrise, though.
"Of course we're all going," Shudder spat out when Damien suggested he stay behind and rest.
"Blaze could stay with you. I don't think it's much farther—"
Blaze cut him off. "Like hell. You're not going on alone on foot. Rockslide. One fall that leaves you hobbled, and you're crispy, burnt toast." He crossed his arms over his chest, the wonderful, massive expanse Damien was struggling not to picture naked, and glared at them in turn, finally settling on Shudder. "Can you even walk?"
"I've been walking since I was two, Blazey."
"Smartass. You know that's not what I meant."
Shudder's smile was a poor imitation of its usual glory. "I'm up. I can walk."
"Fan-fucking-tabulous. How far are we from a, what did you call it, terminus? Best estimate."
Damien started for the back of the Raptor to pull out packs. "A day, day and a half. Can't be much more than that, even if it's slow going."
"Five days' worth of supplies, then. Just in case." Blaze poked a finger at Shudder's chest. "You don't get a pack. You get a walking stick. And you sure as shit better speak up if you're hurting."
"Yes, Mommy." Shudder batted his eyes at Blaze and earned a hard cuff to his shoulder, though Blaze immediately reached out to steady him.
Damien hid a smile as he packed enough food and water for the three of them, the medkit, and two of the insulated bags. Someone could share. He locked up the vehicles while Blaze cut a stout branch from a nearby deadfall for Shudder.
For the first few miles, their path meandered through the narrow canyon in a relatively flat, unobstructed trail. The high rock faces shaded them from the sun, and Shudder whistled softly as he walked, much more himself again.
Too much to hope that the way would be easy the whole route. Soon the land began to rise. They found themselves scrambling over jagged rock falls and up slopes of scree, where climbing using both hands and feet was safer on uncertain traction. Damien forced himself to stop and slow at the top of each of these, though it was hard. He wanted to rush toward the end of his trails. They were multiplying. Tara had come through here not twice but several times.
Shudder's progress uphill became slower each time, though, and if they weren't so many hours away from the vehicles already, Damien would have insisted that he go back. Finally, at the top of a steep rise, Shudder clutched at a scruffy pine and collapsed to his knees, his breaths coming in sobbing gasps.
"What did I say, moron?" Blaze said softly as he knelt beside him.
"It hurts. I'm telling you." Shudder transferred his grip to Blaze's coat. "Bailey…"
"Shh. I'm here. Breathe slow." Blaze pulled him close so Shudder could lean against him. He didn't even react to the use of his birth name. "Gonna puke?"
"Don't think so."
"Small favors. Okay. Rest a minute while I think."
