Page 109 of This Memory
Dr. Lark nodded. “Sure is. Oh, now they’re grabbing their hands.”
The next thing we heard was the sound of the baby’s heartbeat filling the room. I blinked rapidly to keep my tears at bay. When I looked at Brystol, she was smiling at the screen.
“Heartbeat is good and strong. Let’s look at all the organs.”
I held my breath as she showed us each organ, and when she said everything looked normal, I exhaled loudly.
“I was holding my breath too!” Brystol laughed.
“Do we want to know the gender?” Dr. Lark asked.
“We do,” Brystol said, as she squeezed my hand.
“Guesses?” the doctor asked.
Brystol looked at me and winked. “We both think it’s a girl.”
Dr. Lark smiled. “You’re both right! You are growing a healthy baby girl.”
Brystol lost her battle and started to cry. I leaned over and buried my face in her neck, crying as well.
“Evelyn would have been so happy!”
I kissed her on the forehead. “I love you.”
She placed her hand on the side of my face and brushed a tear away. “I love you too.”
Dr. Lark handed us both tissues.
“I know this is a happyandsad time for you both. Do either of you guys have any questions for me?”
Brystol shook her head.
“Not that I can think of right now.”
Dr. Lark reached for Brystol’s hand. “Congratulations, Mom.” Turning to me, she said, “And Dad. You’re going to make wonderful parents.”
It took everything I had not to cry again. Christ, who was the pregnant one here?
As if reading my mind, Dr. Lark winked at me.
“I printed out a few photos for you here. One of them says ‘it’s a girl’ on there. I also made a video; Carol, at the desk, will give it to you when you check out.”
After cleaning up Brystol’s stomach, Dr. Lark hugged us both and told us to go celebrate.
We walked out of the office hand in hand with our printed ultrasound photos and video.
“I think weshouldcelebrate,” I said as I opened the car door and Brystol slipped in.
When I got into the car, Brystol asked, “Please tell me your celebration involves food. I’m starving.”
I laughed. “Yes, it involves food. First, tell me how you’re feeling.”
She smiled. “I’m so happy, Gavin. I mean, sometimes I still can’t believe we’re going to be raising this child. I think the best thing we ever could have done is agree to therapy.”
“Me too.”
“It’s really helped me to navigate these mixed emotions. There are so many. I mean, neither of us was ready to be a parent yet, but here we are. I’m happy, and still so sad. I feel blessed, yet I can’t help but wonder why Evelyn and Denny didn’t get this opportunity.”
