Page 139 of The Wrong Husband
The words trip off her tongue like she’s said them many times, or read about them a lot.
"Wow, you really are in therapy." I look at her, wide-eyed.
"Mind you, it wasn’t voluntary, not at first. But your father told me it was time for me to sort out my relationship with you. He’d had enough of me moping around the house and feeling sorry for myself." She laughs. "And it wasn’t easy. I had to go through a few therapists before I found someone I vibed with. But now, I’m one of those obnoxious people who can’t complete a conversation without bringing my therapist into it."
She rolls her beautiful, kohl-lined eyes. I’ve always admired how she always looks so put together. And how she takes pains with her appearance. Maybe, that’s why I chose a profession where I don’t have time to dress up, or style my hair, or take care of my nails, the way I remember my mom spending time on those things.
"How are you, darling?" She takes my hand in hers. "Are you happy?"
"I am." I hesitate.
She frowns. "You did want to get married, didn’t you?"
"Of course." I look at her, surprised. "He didn’t force me to elope. In fact, it was my idea."
"Oh." Her shoulders sag. "You didn’t want us to be at the wedding?"
"It wasn’t that… It was—" It’s my turn to lower my chin. "Yeah, that was part of it. But really, I wasn’t ready to be the center of attention. I didn’t feel ready to have everyone important in my life there while I vowed myself to a man who I was figuring out my feelings for."
"So, if you weren’t ready, why did you get married?" She frowns.
"It’s not like that. I knew I trusted him—"And I do trust him.Until I said it aloud, I didn’t realize how much. "I wanted to be with him. I guess, in a way, I didn’t want to second-guess myself. I wanted to follow my instinct to the logical conclusion and not give myself a chance to wriggle out of it. Because I knew he’d be good for me." If only, I could also share everything about my past with him? And I should be able to, because I just admitted to myself that I do trust him. "It didn’t hurt that he had the necessary influence to stop the ER where I work from closing down."
"Is that why you married him? So, he could help your career."
I shake my head. "I thought that was the reason, but I was kidding myself. No, I married him because?—"
"You love him." My mom completes my statement.
"What? No—" My voice tapers off. Do I love him? I know I have feelings for him, but… Love? Could I have fallen in love with my husband so quickly? Sure, he knows how to bring me pleasure and fulfillment, but it's not that, really… It's because… There's something about him that makes me want to believe that I can live out the rest of my days with him. An instinctual reaction where I'm drawn to him. Where I feel like he’ll be there for me, no matter what.Unlike Drew.
Oh my God. When did my feelings got all confused?
Did a part of me hope I could keep a distance from him? Is that why I agreed to marry him? Thinking I wouldn’t let myself fall for him. But I did. My head spins. I let myself be open to being hurt again. How could I do this? I jump to my feet. "I… I need to get back to the hospital."
My mum rises with me. "But honey, they’re all waiting for you for dinner."
"I… I can’t." To my relief my phone vibrates. I pull it out of my bag and hold it up. "See, the hospital needs me; it’s an emergency."
48
Connor
"Where’s Fever?"
"Fever?" Her mother knits her eyebrows.
Phe was visibly agitated at the thought of meeting her parents. When her mother returned without her, I realized the meeting must have upset her.
I should have been next to her when she spoke to her mother.
But I didn't want to come off as being intrusive. This is her mother, after all.
In the future, it doesn’t matter who she's meeting, if I feel the person will compromise Phe’s peace of mind, I'll insist on being present.
"Phoenix. Where is she?" I try to keep the annoyance from my voice and fail.
"She left." Her mother sounds confused.
