Page 130 of The Cruel Dawn
His expression remains neutral. “Then you know why I’m here.”
“No,” I say, “I’ve only heard rumors, but you have said nothing to me directly. I can’t wait to learn why I must die—and why you must be the one to kill me.”
Zephar’s smirk fades.
“While I was away from you, I…” I swallow and continue. “I found companionship with someone else.”
He doesn’t react.
I want him to react, so I take a step toward him and say, cruelly, “I fucked Jadon Rrivae Wake. Last season and then two nights ago. I regret neither occasion.”
His cheeks burn bright as he clenches his jaw.
I cock my head. “Now. Tell me all that you’ve wanted to say but have only whispered behind my back.”
“For Vallendor Realm to reach its true potential,” Zephar finally replies, his voice hard, “you must no longer be its Grand Defender.”
“You question my leadership, then?”
“Your leadership is simply a symptom of the larger disease,” he says. “Your father, Izariel—”
“You will respect your lord’s name,” I snap, my words hot enough to gather the storm clouds now forming above us.
Zephar’s eyes flare, but he waits, inhaling and exhaling. He squares his shoulders, then says, “We no longer recognize his position in our order.Izarielbroke his vow to his order when he sought companionship within another order, a weaker order, and compounded his offense by conceiving a daughter.”
“Me,” I say, bristling. “So?”
“Only Mera can be defenders and destroyers,” he says.
“My mixed blood is no fault of my own—”
“I never claimed it was.”
“And I’ve proven myself to be Mera—”
He snorts and rolls his eyes. “You’reherebecause you were given Vallendor as Izariel’s daughter.”
“And you were my second because you’re the son of Bezeph Itikin, my father’s old friend, and because he and your mother wanted me to be your bride.”
Bezeph, a former captain, had waged war beside my father since their first campaign. They’d been best friends until Bezeph’s marriage to Mablinel, a Mera socialite whose family paid others to fulfill their required service. Once Father started to secretly see my mother, Mablinel conspired to expose their relationship. That is, until Father joined the Council of High Orders.Thenshe fostered the friendship and eventual courtship between Zephar and me and even allowed her daughter, Naelah, to fight alongside us. Naelah is no more, and Zephar remains a prisoner on the realm that he’d been assigned to protect with me.
“What did Orewid Rolse promise you and the other Diminished?” I ask.
Zephar doesn’t answer.
“Will you fight with me against Danar Rrivae?”
He laughs but doesn’t say “yes” or “no.”
“Zephar,” I say, “he is the common threat right now. Can’t you put aside this stupid purification test in the face of the danger we’re in?”
He folds his arms and lowers his chin to his chest.
“Orewid Rolse does this, Zee,” I say. “He stirs up Mera like you who have otherwise been disciplined, and he appeals to your anger and desire to strike back. He blames those of us with the blood of other orders for your station in life, and you believe him. There are so many Mera in jail or wandering Anathema because of this man, someone who’s never been jailed or punished in any way.”
Still no response from my former lover.
“I’ve seen the living-dead Mera,” I say. “Are you in favor of these abominations?”
