Page 191 of The Last One
“I can’t—” Jadon paces, moving even farther away, tugging his hair with one hand. “I should never have let it go this far.”
“But you let it go this far, and here we stand.” I blink away angry tears burning my eyes. “Only cowards run.”
“I promise you,” he says, his words faltering, “I’m leaving for your own good. When I say that I don’t want to hurt you, I mean it.”
I hold out my arms. “Then don’t hurt me.Stophurting me.”
“All of this, it’s unreasonable, I know. All of this is inevitable. Unavoidable.”
“What’s inevitable? What’s unavoidable?” I ask, not wanting to give up, but I don’t even know if I want to win. I don’t know what it evenmeansto win. My heart slows as I open myself to the inevitable, the unavoidable. No more “us.” My skin grows clammy as a new thought blooms in my mind: all this time, I’ve accused Olivia of betraying me, when all along…
Don’t trust anyone. Depend on you and you alone.
Veril told me not to trust Jadon.
I should have listened.
Olivia stole my clothes, and for the second time, she’s stolen my amulet, and she’s now traded it for her freedom. Jadon, the son of the man who’s been hunting me, is working with Gileon, who is also working with Elyn. Who knows what else he’s done.
All because they think I’m a threat to the One—to Elyn?
Do they really believe that my purpose for being here is to fuck around with mortals who want shinier castles and more land, more riches, more worshippers? Why should I care about that? Why would I risk my life to simply stop the nonsense oftime-hoarderson an emperor who will die, and his two sons who will die, and their sons who will die? Does a bear care about the daily life of ants? Do ants think they can bring down a bear? They can make the bear miserable, sure. But actually killing the bear? Oh, the folly of ants.
But now I see that the ants are working for a bear, one who commands otherworldly to kill, who spills protective magic upon the emperor’s soldiers for her benefit.
I’m also a bear, a goddess, the Grand Defender. Before forgetting my life, I didn’t fear men as I moved above the realm. And I don’t fear them now even in my weakest state. Elyn may think she knows who I am, but she doesn’tunderstandwho I am. Because if she wanted to successfully destroy me, she’d need to do more than sic Syrus Wake and his sons on me and keep me away from my amulet. Wake and his sons should’ve been just as eternal as me.
Oh, the absurdity of these men who believed they could possibly end me.
The only person in Vallendor who’s just as eternal as me and has the power and ability to destroy me is Elyn. She should’ve skipped using the Wakes—her humans—as trained falcons who’ve done nothing but warn me that she’s near.
“Is your boss on her way here?” I now ask Jadon.
He doesn’t speak.
“Did you make it so that I’d be too weak to fight against someone so strong?”
He keeps his gaze averted and remains silent.
So that’s how it’s supposed to end. I’m supposed to die by Elyn’s hand. Did he bring me to this cave for that purpose? Will this be my tomb?
I hold back the first sob that rattles my chest, but the second escapes. “How could you be soheartless? How can you be socruel?”
Pain and sorrow streak across Jadon’s face. He takes a step toward me, reaching out like he might comfort me.
“You and Olivia,” I say, swiping away my tears, backing away from him. “You both stole something from me. The thing that keeps me whole is gone. You plundered with her—and you did far more damage to me thananyoneon this journey. You had the privilege to touch me, to sleep beside me, to sit and talk to me, and even now, you’re standing here and I haven’t thrown you across this cave. A privilege you trampled.”
I turn away, willing my legs to keep me upright. “You don’t have to pretend to care about me anymore,” I snarl. “You don’t have to take care of me and keep me alive for her. Your job is done. You may now stop slumming and return to Brithellum to collect your reward. Go on and pick up your princess and polish your crown and make your little babies and tell epic stories of that time in your life that you fucked the Lady of the Verdant Realm.”
“You think all this is about getting you inbed?” he asks, eyes hard. “Isthatwhat you’re saying?”
I meet his glare with one of my own. “If I say what Iwantto say, you’d have no ears to hear another word spoken ever again.”
“You don’t know me at all,” he whispers.
“Poor, misunderstood Jadon. You know what? I can’t listen to this anymore.” I shake my head, but the rest of me shakes even more. With a trembling hand, I point to the world beyond the cave, where the daystar slinks behind the horizon. “Go. Do your own thing. You don’t want tohurtme? Guess what? You failed. You hurt me. Fuck you.”
Silence fills the cave—if it wasn’t for the crackle of fire and the drip of water somewhere in this rock, one could mistake this place for a tomb.
