Page 70 of Game Changer
I have no right to be upset that he’s curious about it. Anyone would be, and frankly, I’m surprised he lasted this long without demanding an answer. But is it really worth crushing his self-esteem if I’m going to beg my parents to change their mind next weekend? A seven-day stall isn’t that long for him to wait for an answer. This way, if my parents react better than I expect them to, I won’t have to put a damper on his progress so far.
He may want the truth, but for now, I’m only giving him a fraction of it.
Just a few more days.
I turn on my side to face him in the dark hotel room. The lights from the city cast his cheeks in a moonlit hue. “A part of me was afraid of what I felt for you the first time we had sex,” I admit. “It felt too real. Too serious. And I wasn’t in the right place mentally to take on a relationship with you oranyone.”
“But you are now?”
“I mean, I was still scared at first, but then you gave me that styling tool for my birthday, and everything fell into place. You’ve always been the one, I’ve just been too afraid to admit it. First, it was because of Maddie, and then it was because of—” I clear my throat when I almost slip up. “There were a lot of reasons to try and avoid my feelings, but you made it impossible for me to run away from them any longer, Ethan, and I’m tired of fighting them. I want you. For the long term.”
Does not telling him the complete truth make me an utter ass? Fully. However, it’s better this way if I can spare him more heartache.
Besides, I’d never ghost him like I did the last time. I’ve learned my lesson.
“I’m holding you to that,” he says with a sleepy smile. “Thanks for telling me. Feels like a weight has been lifted off my chest now.”
And when he comes back from the bathroom to pull me against his chest, when his soft snores fill the silence, only then does the guilt threaten to swallow me whole.
I have to fix this.
Come hell or high water, I’ll get my parents approval.
Thirty- six
Maya
“Are you sure you’re ready to do this?” Ethan, who offered to drive me to my parents, slides his eyes to mine as a form of reassurance. I insisted I could take the bus back home, but he refused and wouldn’t take no for an answer. And when I panicked and said he couldn’t come inside because I was planning on telling them about my decision to pursue cosmetology—I didn’t have the heart to tell him about the other reason—he didn’t mind one bit. He only wanted to drive me for emotionalsupport. He claimed it worked out because he wanted to see his parents anyway, but sitting outside my house now makes everythingreal. “We agreed on me not coming inside, but if you need someone . . .”
“No, it’s fine. I’ve got this.” I open the passenger-side door with a deep breath and give him a weak smile. “I’ll call to let you know how it goes, okay?”
Something flickers in his blue irises, telling me he’s aware something is up, but rather than push me on it, he dips his chin and leans over to squeeze my hand. “Sure.”
On my way up the gravel path to my home, I attempt to wipe my hands on the back of my jeans. It’s weird. I assumed things would be different when I left for college, but nothing seems to have changed. The flower beds are still flourishing, and the tiny windmill by the rundown porch steps is still spinning.
The only thing that’s changed is me.
“¡Bambina!”The door flies open, and both of my parents nearly tackle me to the ground. Their scent envelops me and surrounds me with a sense of home I can’t get anywhere else. It makes me ashamed that I used to be embarrassed by this tiny trailer when it was filled with so much love. “You got here sooner than you told us yesterday.” Even with her thick accent, I can already tell my mom’s classes have improved her English drastically. She’s annunciating words so much better than she ever had before.
“Yeah, sorry. Change of plans.” My heart pounds when my dad glances behind me to where Ethan is still sitting in his car. Realization dawns on him before his eyes narrow into slits.
He points to the car.“¿Quien es ese?”
“Papí. English,por favor.” It seems only my mom has been taking the classes seriously. Don’t get me wrong, I love speaking Spanish and would never expect them to forget where they came from, but if I plan on traveling and making my dreams come true, I need to feel confident leaving them alone. I need to know they’ll be okay here by themselves.
“Okay.Whoisthat? You said you were taking the bus.”
“Can we finish this discussion inside, please?” I don’t want Ethan to see this fight go down on the front porch, especially when he’s unaware that the main subject of the disagreement will be him. I have no clue why he hasn’t driven off yet, but his car is still idling outside, and, oddly, it feels nice knowing there’s a getaway car in case things don’t go the way I plan.
With ahuff, my dad moves to the side to allow me to pass, but not before casting a lingering glare at the car. As if to ensure he can keep eyes on Ethan the entire time, he only shuts the screen door, and it’s an effort not to roll my eyes.
“Is that Maddie’s brother?” he asks. “The boy we told you not to see?”
This is the time where I could lie through my teeth and tell them we’re just friends, but I don’t want to be dishonest anymore about us when Ethan has been nothing but good to me. He doesn’t deserve to be my dirty little secret.
I take a seat on the couch, watching them sit in the chairs across from it before I reply, “Yes. We’re dating.”
My father mutters something beneath his breath—likely a curse word of some sort. “We said no, bambina.”
