Page 46 of Royal Beast
“Thank you for reminding me what I signed up for,” she says, her voice steady despite the strain I can see beneath it. She turns and walks past me, leaving me standing there, the weight of my own words settling like a stone in my chest.
I watch Darcy walk past me, her back stiff, her steps steady but filled with something I can’t quite place. Anger? Resignation? I don’t know. But she’s already made up her mind, and I can’t bring myself to stop her.
I tell myself this is for the best. That it’s better this way. The closer we get, the messier things become. The more I care, the more I put her at risk. My world, the one I was born into, isn’ta place for someone like her. Not someone so full of warmth, of life, of hope. I need to keep her at arm’s length. It’s safer for both of us.
But damn if it doesn’t hurt.
I shake my head, pushing those thoughts away. There are more fires to put out and more deals to close. I don’t have time for this. No time for petty things like feelings to get in the way.
“Take care of yourself, Darcy,” I say quietly, as much to myself as to her. She doesn’t respond, doesn’t turn back, and for a moment, I wonder if I’ve made a mistake.
But then the weight of the world falls back onto my shoulders, and I leave, heading toward the door. I can’t let myself get distracted. Not with everything on the line.
As I step outside, my phone buzzes. I pull it out, already knowing the message I’ll see, but still, my heart sinks a little more when I read it.
Don’t bother coming home tonight.
It’s Darcy.
I stare at the screen, my thumb hovering above the reply button.
What the hell am I doing?
23
DARCY
After kissing Rose on the head, I head off to work, the argument with Kellan still fresh on my mind. Every word he said was a painful reminder that this marriage is just a transaction. I’ve been so stupid letting myself get too close. Hoping for more was completely foolish, and last night was the harsh wake-up call I needed. I’m not here to play house or to get my heart broken. I’m here for Rose.
As I reach the office, I square my shoulders and shut the door on every thought of him. For her sake, I need to stay focused, stay strong. It’s time to stop letting Kellan get under my skin. This marriage is a means to an end, nothing more. I’ve got work to do, and my energy is better spent on that than pining over a man who’s made it clear that he’ll never be mine.
And work, thankfully, isn’t lacking. As soon as I sit at my desk, I dive into the tasks ahead. Emails, meeting notes, revisions, anything to keep my mind off the mess at home. Around mid-morning, I get an email, the very email I’d been waiting on for weeks now. This could be the break I need, the kind of news that could be the win I’ve been hoping for.
I scroll through the email feeling a hint of excitement beneath my carefully constructed wall. It's time to refocus, to find my strength in something I can count on.
Over the next few weeks, Kellan and I play our parts at each of his events. We arrive together, looking like the perfect couple, showing off dazzling smiles and acting like we’re deeply in love.
At Senator Burns’ fundraiser, I laugh at Kellan’s jokes, loop my arm through his, and beam at anyone watching. We look like we belong, as though we’re the picture of happiness.
Every now and then, I catch him watching me from the corner of his eye, his expression unreadable, but the second our gazes meet, he’s back to business, switching his focus to someone else with a polite nod. I feel a strange ache tugging at me every time he does that. It's like he’s physically there but mentally miles away, too far away to reach.
During one particularly dull moment in the evening, when we’re both nursing glasses of wine, I turn to him, trying to break the ice. “I didn’t know you were such a fan of the Senator’s education platform,” I murmur, keeping my tone light.
Kellan glances down at me, his blue eyes cool. “I thought we were on the same page about public appearances, Darcy,” he says smoothly. “But if you’d rather skip these events, by all means.”
“Oh, no, you’d be lost without me,” I say, matching his cool tone. We both wear smiles, though neither of us is truly smiling.
Then he looks away, his jaw clenched, and something tightens in my chest. It’s ridiculous to feel disappointed. We both agreed to this arrangement, after all. But sometimes, I can’t help but think back to those fleeting moments when it felt real, when it felt like he wanted more than just an arrangement.
Once we’re home, the distance between us becomes palpable. Kellan disappears into his study almost immediately, and I settlein the den with Rose, who’s curled up in my lap with her favorite storybook.
“Mama,” Rose whispers, looking up at me with her wide, trusting eyes. “Where’s Kellan? Why doesn’t he come with us to the park anymore?”
I pause, brushing a strand of hair from her face. “Kellan’s very busy with work right now, honey,” I say softly, feeling a twist of guilt at the half-truth. “He wants to come with us. He just can’t.”
Rose looks down at her book, her little fingers tracing the edge of the page. “He used to come with us,” she says quietly. “I miss him.”
Her words cut deep, lingering as I tuck her into bed later that night. As I watch her fall asleep, her tiny fist curled under her cheek, a pang of longing spreads through me. I miss him, too. I miss the version of him I thought I was getting to know, the one who laughed with me, who cared about Rose, who felt like he belonged in our lives.
