Page 96 of Puck My Stepbrother
“I just needed to be totally sure we were on the same page. I’ve never really been in a relationship before.”
Quinn’s eyes grew large, like I’d made the most preposterous comment he’d ever heard.
“That’s not true, Levi. Didn’t you say you had like a million girlfriends?”
“Maybe not a million. Five hundred thousand or so, but never a steady one. Never a girl I focused all my time, attention, and love on.”
Using that word in connection with any of the women I’d dated felt funny. Only then did I realize I hadn’t come close to loving any of them. I’d been playing the field and having a good time. I didn’t love them, but back then I didn’t know what love was.
I hadn’t learned how real love felt until Quinn and I had become a real couple.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that sounds touchy-feely for a guy who spends most of his time crushing skulls on the ice. A real Hallmark movie. But it was the truth. I didn’t feel ashamed to speak that truth to Quinn.
“Seriously?” he asked.
“Uh-huh.”
My boyfriend’s eyes shifted away as he pondered that.
Would you listen to me?My boyfriend.I hadn’t called him the love of my life (which he totally was) but even giving him that simple title felt so bold, so freeing. I wanted to use it at every opportunity.
I pulled my hand away from my boyfriend and sat back, admiring him.
“You’ve got a reason for bringing this up,” Quinn said. “Why don’t you go ahead and tell me what’s on your mind?”
“We’re boyfriends now, but we’ve never gone on a real date.”
“So?”
“So I think that’s kind of shitty, don’t you?”
“I hadn’t thought about it one way or another. It just is what it is.”
I didn’t remind him that surprising him in the shower was far from the normal way people get together. Still, my mind drifted back to that night, and I relived the excitement I’d felt. I wouldn’t have taken that back for anything. After all, it’d gotten the ball rolling and opened Quinn up to an endless supply of opportunities.
Now I wanted our relationship to be about more than sexual thrills. I wanted something more meaningful.
“When you think about it,” Quinn said, “I’ve never been in a true relationship.”
“What about Jeff?”
“I don’t count that. I wasn’t all-in on him, even if I didn’t realize it. I guess we had enough normal dates building up to what we did have, though.”
“Right. I want us to have something special, a night we can remember forever. I don’t want our first memories together to be so weird.”
He half-smiled at that, like he felt relieved that I at least recognized how crazy my behavior had been in the beginning.
“You’re a romantic, aren’t you?” I asked.
“Fuck no. I’m probably the least romantic person you’ll ever meet.”
“Do you want to change that?”
He paused again, probably thinking I was the strangest person on the entire planet.
“I don’t know, Levi. Would it make a difference?”
“Of course it would. After everything we’ve been through together, it only makes sense to reward ourselves.”
