Page 86 of Puck My Stepbrother
“Okay, so you’re making this my fault then?” I asked.
“It’s not your fault, Quinn. It’s not anybody’s fault. It’s just one of those things.”
I huffed, which drew silence from Jeff. He had no solid answers, not that I expected any. Yeah, I wasn’t making this easy for him, and I saw no harm in giving him exactly what he deserved.
“I’m really not getting what you’re saying,” I said. “Maybe I need it spelled out for me.”
“When we first started dating, Quinn, I thought you were a great guy. I still do. You’ve got it all. You’re cute, you’re smart,you’re funny, you’ve got a lot going for you. You’re everything I could ever want in a guy.”
“But?”
“But it’s like you’re emotionally unavailable most of the time.”
“You’re losing me again.”
“It’s hard to explain.”
“Try.”
“It’s like you’ve been checked out—not just mentally, but emotionally, too. I can’t be with someone like that.”
“So you’re saying I’m emotionally unavailable? Is that it?”
“Yes and no. I’m not saying it’s the normal kind of emotionally unavailable. It’s kind of a special case.”
Now I felt silly for letting Jeff explain this. He’d practically turned into a psychologist, which I totally didn’t need at the moment.
“I’m sorry if I don’t see it the same way,” I said.
“It’s pretty clear to me that you’re in love. Problem is, you’re in love with someone who isn’t me.”
My hand clenched the phone in a death grip.
“I’m in love with someone else?” I asked. “But I stayed with you all this time!”
“Because you wouldn’t admit you were in love.”
“Then why don’t you go ahead and tell me who I’m in love with?”
“Levi Dunn.”
“Oh, come on. You’re being ridiculous now.”
“No, I’m not. I know he’s going to be your stepbrother in another hour or two, but it doesn’t matter. I noticed the look on your face the first time he crashed our coffee date at Spot Coffee. At first, I tried not to think too much about it. I thought you really didn’t want him there.”
“Because I didn’t!”
“You didn’t want him there because you couldn’t handle your feelings. Anyway, I saw something else. It was in your eyes, really. I don’t know exactly what to call it. It was justsomething. I saw it again the second time, too. I couldn’t just ignore it.”
I found myself breathing heavier, wanting to cut him off and denounce his story as bullshit. Did I really want to listen to this insanity? Problem was, Jeff sounded perfectly rational when speaking, like he truly believed it. I could continue to deny it, but he wouldn’t believe me no matter what I tried.
“I know something was up when we tried screwing around at my house,” he said.
“I thought you were being understanding about that.”
“I was. I’m not a prick, you know. But I couldn’t help feeling like you had something else going on. Internal conflict, I mean. And then, when we finally did screw around at your house, it pretty much confirmed everything I believed.”
“Because Levi could’ve walked in on us?”
