“Dunno.”
“Of course you did. You wouldn’t have bolted on me if you hadn’t.”
By saying that, Levi displayed another maddening trait: sounding so fucking sure of himself I honestly could’ve puked.
“I get it,” he said. “You’re a virgin. You were nervous. I don’t judge.”
“It’s not because of that.”
“You might not believe it, but I was nervous my first time. I was fumbling around all over the place like a total idiot. You would’ve sworn to fucking God I didn’t even know where to stick it.”
Then he howled with laughter like he’d said the funniest thing in history.
“I told you it’s not about that,” I said.
Levi paused, but that didn’t mean the conversation was over.
I expected him to cup a hand over mine or rub his foot against my leg. In fact, I wondered if Levi had convinced my dad to task us with wedding planning as an excuse to spend more time with me.
I’d put nothing past Levi Dunn.
“Look,” I said, “I’m gonna go.”
“Right now? We’ve still got things to go over.”
“Text me about anything you want to know.”
You had your chance,I wanted to say, but instead I spent the last of my courage standing up and marching out of the room. I didn’t look back until I’d reached my bedroom.
Once inside, I flopped down onto the bed, where I felt sure Levi had once lain. In my hottest fantasies, he’d been naked. I touched myself as that image swirled through my mind. Then I fought even harder to push those thoughts out of my head.
But I couldn’t. They kept inching back like an incoming tide. And I worried that my plan of saving my virginity for Jeff would snap under the weight of my desire for Levi Dunn.
12
LEVI
“Itold you to come visit my room anytime,” I told Quinn when I stopped him in the hall later that night. “And I meant every word.”
“I know.”
My stepbrother’s voice sounded cracked and weak, even over just the two syllables he’d spoken. It reminded me of how nervous he’d seemed at the kitchen table before fleeing again. But I knew what he wanted, no matter how many walls he put up, and I loved nothing more than a challenge.
“Then why haven’t you come to see me?” I asked.
He offered a tiny shrug, not even bothering with words this time. The more he resisted, the more determined I was to get both of us exactly what we wanted.
“Come on in,” I said.
He paused, his face turning as white as if he’d seen a ghost.
“What are you waiting for?” I asked. “The second coming?”
“It’s nothing,” he said. “It’s just that I…”
I stepped into my room and waved him inside, then stood and waited until he realized that I’d stay right here until heobeyed my command. He shuffled into my room and sat down on the bed.
“I want to show you what I’ve done with the room,” I said. “Over there, I’ve got my forty-eight-inch TV, but I’ve got a nice clear space of wall I can use for my projector. And look at all the Blu-rays I’ve got.”