Page 67 of The Now in Forever
“Yeah. Fine.” I swing my legs off the bed, sitting on the edge. I should be happy for him. Why do I feel like this?
“You can still set a deadline, and either make a reward or a consequence if you don’t make it. Do you prefer treats or punishment?”
“Who doesn’t prefer treats?”
Ed shrugs. “When do you want to finish by?”
“A month,” I say without thinking, but when it comes out, it feels right. A month to finish up the first draft will give me time to clean it up then get some opinions and start sending it out by my birthday in October. That feels right.
“Okay. If you finish your draft by August fifth, I’ll buy you ice cream.”
I frown.
Ed laughs. “Not good enough. I’ll…” Ed leans down and whispers naughty nothings in my ear.
My cheeks are warm, and the sensation spreads down my neck, through my stomach, to my thighs.
I look up to meet his green eyes, on fire from the morning sun. “That and an ice cream.”
Ed smiles, slow as honey. “Deal.”
He puts down his coffee and his phone.
“I thought you were going to shower.”
“Hmm, I think we should get dirty first.”
He pulls my sports bra off then bends down to kneel in front of me, grabbing one side of my underwear then the other. I move a bit to help him take them off, a pulse of want spreading through me. He moves one of my legs open, so slowly I can feel every fiber of the smooth cotton sheet underneath my skin, and then he does the same to the other leg. He just looks for a long slow beat with one hand on each leg. My breath seizes. He moves his focus to my eyes.
“Do you want me to touch you?”
“Yes.”
“Where?”
My heart is racing. “There.”
“Show me how.”
I move my fingers over the sensitive swollen skin, my nipples hardening with every circle. Ed watches me, and then he leans in and licks softly. He moves my fingers and replaces them with his, mimicking my circles. I lean back, the sensation overwhelming. He moves one finger inside softly then a second. I cry out as I clench around him. I try to pull him up toward me, but he keeps the steady rhythm of his movements. The motion makes my hips buck toward him. He puts his mouth back on me, his soft lips causing tingles to shoot through me.
Stars erupt, and all my muscles tighten. I pull on Ed’s hair as I come.
He climbs onto the bed and holds me, the big spoon to my little spoon. My heart is still beating fast.
I turn to him. As we kiss, I move my hands down his body, but he stops me. “I’m going to get in the shower now.”
“What about you?” I look down to emphasize my point.
He plants a small kiss on my head. “This morning was just for you. A preview of the prize waiting for you at the end of your novel.”
He kisses me again then walks out the door. It’s sweet, really. But I can’t help but feel cold and alone. I didn’t want this morning to be just for me. I wanted it to be for us.
I throw on a robe, then, grabbing my laptop, I get to work, trying to shove words into the hole left by Ed’s absence. I’m being dramatic. He’s just in the shower, but it’s an occupational hazard.
As I write more, I realize maybe I don’t need Ed’s prize at the end of this draft. It will be nice, sure, but I can get there on my own. What lies before me is murky and uncertain. So much of life and love is out of my hands, but this is not. My book is in my control. I can finish my novel when I want and how I want then show it to who I want. And so too can Ed.
CHAPTER 17
