Page 17 of The Now in Forever
Suddenly, there’s concrete in my throat. I swallow hard to try to get it down, but it’s still there. I offer my hand, and Ed takes it in his. He squints, moving his face extremely close to my palm, his breath hot on my hand.
He moves his face back and takes his finger, softly tracing the line from my thumb to the base of my palm. Heat rushes straight to my thighs, and my cheeks warm at his touch, so light it almost tickles. Iwant to pull away, and I want to lean into the feeling at the same time. I want to snap the air like a cat that’s had too many pets.
“Hmm. I think you have water hands, but they could be air.”
“What’s the difference?”
“Well, your fingers are spindly like air hands?—”
“Spindly? Who you calling spindly?”
He smiles. “But they’re soft and narrow like water. Let’s say they’re water.” He consults the book again and reads aloud. “You are fueled by compassion and imagination. You’re also extremely sensitive, and your feelings are easily hurt.”
I frown, embarrassed how shockingly accurate that all is. Ever since I was a kid, my mom always said,You’re so sensitive, Hattie. Lighten up. Like my feelings were heavy. She was right—they were—but telling me I should feel them less just made me lonely and anxious. So, when I was sad about something, not only was I sad, I was also worried that I was being too sad.
Ed traces a line near the base of my fingers. “This is your heart line. It tells about your relationships, both romantic and friendship.”
I hold my breath, waiting to hear what my palm reveals about my love life.
“Since it starts below your index finger, you are content in your relationships and tend to have long, lasting ones.”
“That’s true of my friends.”
“But not your boyfriends?”
My face is on fire. “I haven’t had a serious boyfriend.”
“You haven’t?”
I shake my head.
“No fella back in…where again?”
“Montana—Helena. No. I mean…there was this one guy, Brandon…but he moved so…We kept dating for a while. We were in love. We promised to text and call all the time, but it turned into me texting him, waiting for a reply.”
“That’s shitty.”
I shrug, wanting it to seem lighter than it felt. “We were young.”
Ed moves on, tracing another line so delicately, it brings me back to the bookstore.
“This is your lifeline. It’s a deep groove, suggesting that you have full rich experiences.”
I think I have full experiences. Itryto live in the moment. Once, I read that living in the present is the key to true happiness. I won’t bore you with how many times I have to remind myself of this while I’m ruminating on some mundane detail from the past—something everyone else has long forgotten that I’m still running circles around in my head. Like the boy who never texted me back. So, it’s still a work in progress.
Ed traces another line, bringing me back to the present that I strive to live in.
“This is the line of destiny. Hmm… Yours is narrow and a little faint, so you are not likely to be bound by a common destiny.”
“That sounds terrifying.”
Ed laughs and drops my hand.
“Wait, what about you?”
He holds out his palm to me, and I consult the book.
“You definitely have air hands—square palms and long fingers.” My hand is starting to sweat. “It says you are easily distracted and can be anxious if not properly stimulated.”
