Page 72 of The Now in Forever
Get married
Have three kids
Publish a book
A long exhale comes out in a whoosh.When I met Chad and reallystarted to fall for him, I thought I was on my way to checking some of these off. And I did, sort of. We never fell what I’d call madly in love, but there was love. And we got married. That’s all gone now. I’m back to square one.
“Dinner’s ready!”
I make my way down. The dining room table is set with falafel, soft pita bread, hummus in a crystal bowl, and a colorful array of veggies. Grandma’s pouring a glass of red wine and hands it to me.
“This is amazing.”
“Cheers, my dear.” She clinks her glass with mine. “Hopefully, it tastes as good as it looks.”
Grandma tells me about the farm. The chickens got out the other day and got into the raspberries. The neighbor about a mile away had a family of barn swallows trying to nest on their property. They had to shoo them away.
“Why? Why couldn’t they let them live there?”
“Oh, Bear, they are so loud, all the time, too. And they poop everywhere!”
When dinner’s over, I insist on doing the dishes, but Grandma insists on helping. Together, we get through them quickly and then take our wine to the porch.
It feels wrong to sit in Grandpa’s chair but rude not to. When he was alive, I used to love to steal his spot. He’d come out and poke me in the ribs. We thought the whole thing was so funny.
Grandma notices my hesitation. “Sit wherever you feel comfortable, dear.”
I give her hand a small squeeze and take my usual perch on the steps.
“So, tell me about this interview?”
“I’d be teaching English still. It’s down the hill at Nelson Middle School.”
Grandma’s lips twitch the smallest bit into a frown. “Middle school?”
“Yep.” I run my hand along the edge of the step, the rough texture a nice distraction.
“Hmm. Didn’t you say that you’d rather teach preschool than middle school?”
I shrug. “I say a lot of things.”
She nods, gazing into the fields surrounding us, the sky dimming to a deep blue.
“I’m surprised you want to live here.”
“Not here in this house. I’d find a place in town, maybe somewhere in Old Town.”
She purses her lips. “And you’d be happy here? Teaching middle school?”
“It’d be nice to be close to you.”
Her eyes close, her frown there in full force now. “I’ve been thinking about moving, actually.”
“Moving?” She’s lived here my whole life.
“It’s a big job for just me. The neighbor kid comes over to help sometimes, but he’s headed off to college in the fall.” She sighs. “Honestly, this place was your grandfather’s. I lived here because he loved it. Uncle Rob invited me to visit him last spring in Hermosa Beach. It was so nice. Warm, less rain, no snow. If I sell this place, I could get a condo near the beach. There’re a few places available by Rob. You know, he swims in the ocean every day.”
I set my wine down, struggling to keep up. “You're going to swim in the ocean?”
