Page 13 of Single Greatest Threat
At Shaw’s demand, Joesph flew to pieces. He gasped for air as his body jerked. Joesph swore time stopped while pleasure rocked his soul. Then Shaw claimed his mouth and muffled cries vibrated against his lips. Joesph saw heaven. He was there with Shaw.
Chapter Six
Shaw was at peacein a way he hadn’t been for a while. He was way too fucking tall for the bathtub inside Haven’s house. That didn’t stop him from sitting in the hot, bubbly water with Joesph between his knees. It had been a long time since they made love. He knew Joesph had to be sore. Shaw just wanted to take care of him. He loved the way Joesph felt, relaxing against his chest. Shaw never got enough of holding him.
“I texted you on my way here to see if you needed anything. You didn’t respond.”
“Shit. When I turned my phone back on earlier, I turned my ringer off.” A soft chuckle rumbled from Joesph. “I spent hours fretting over not hearing from you, and it was my fault.”
He kissed Joesph’s shoulder. “It’s probably for the best you kept your notifications off. Mom and I spent hours making copies of everything. I’m keeping one set and she’s taking the rest home to confront Dad. There’s no telling how he’ll react afterward, but I know he’ll blame everyone but himself.”
“How did she take it? Don’t answer that. That was a ridiculous question. I can’t even imagine. They’ve been married forever.”
“Almost fifty years, since a month after she turned eighteen. She wasn’t as surprised as I expected. It seems Kayla isn’t the first.”
“Damn.”
Shaw couldn’t stop kissing Joesph’s shoulder. He was the only comfort Shaw had. “I know. I never saw my dad as a cheater. That’s crazy, I guess. We represent some of the biggest criminals in town. I guess I should’ve guessed he has no scruples.”
“You have scruples and you’re the one actually doing the defending. Someone has to.”
“I guess.”
Joesph snuggled closer. “You sound so sad. I hate that. Tell me how to make it better.”
“You are just by being here. No one else shows up for me.”
“Not that you make it easy.” The laughter lacing Joesph’s claim took some sting from the words. He knew it was true.
“I don’t know why I’m this way.”
“You were raised to believe the only people deserving of attention were the best of the best. Being perfect and right topped kindness and empathy. In fact, I imagine those things were considered a weakness in your house.”
Shaw’s lips found Joesph’s shoulder again. Kissing him was the only peace he found. “Damn. I should’ve just hired you to be my therapist.”
“I’m probably cheaper.” He toyed with Shaw’s fingers. “But I’m not an expert in that field. I just see you clearly because I haven’t looked away in years.”
Shaw wanted to tell Joesph a million things. He didn’t know where to start. The thing was, life had always been all about him when it came to them. He had to stop. “Speaking of experts in their fields. There’s a doctor in NYC that is the leading MS expert in the U.S., supposedly. Would you see him if I set up an appointment?”
“You’ve been talking to my mom.”
Shaw wouldn’t deny it. “You don’t talk to me. Not really. I had to talk to someone.”
For a moment, Joesph continued focusing on their hands before he finally spoke. “I’ve seen that guy. All the experts in the world won’t change anything. I’m just one of the unlucky twenty percent of people with this disease who live in constant pain and need assistance walking. All anyone can do for me is keep trying medicines until they find something that works the best. This won’t kill me, but it’ll make sure I’m miserable.”
Shaw’s chest hurt. Joesph’s issues made Shaw’s problems seem trivial and self-centered. “Damn.” He pressed his lips against Joesph’s temple. “I’m sorry, baby. You make me feel ridiculous for my week of in-patient treatment for suicidal tendencies. What in the hell do I have to be sad about?”
Joesph moved so fast, Shaw didn’t see it coming. He turned and straddled Shaw. His gaze moved over Shaw’s face. “What? When did this happen? Why didn’t you call me?”
Sometimes, Shaw felt so close to Joesph, he forgot there were things he hadn’t said. This was one of those things. “Not long after you quit.”
He watched Joesph deflate. “I know I told you to lose my number, but surely you knew I’d be there.”
A sad smile tugged at his lips. “Yeah. That’s the problem, isn’t it? You show up for me time and time again while I fail you each and every time. I didn’t want to be that guy. I didn’t want to be anything anymore.” Fuck. He hated admitting that out loud. It was Joesph. He was the only person Shaw trusted.
“And now?”
The hurt in Joesph’s eyes had Shaw tightening his hold and pulling him closer. “Now I just want to be with you. I want the peace and happiness you bring me. But if I had showed up at your door and didn’t get help, you would’ve gotten the same guy you’ve been dealing with for years. I don’t want to be him anymore. It was past time to deal with my bullshit.”
