Page 61 of Depths of Obsession
“So, you feel trapped in a life you don’t want.”
“Exactly. We don’t care aboutla famiglia,not like Mia. She’s embraced it, but Luna and I… we want out. Marrying Gazzago would be a death sentence for me. I wouldn’t survive that.”
Luca studies me, his expression darkening, and I know something’s wrong.
“What?” My stomach churns as dread creeps in. “What are you not telling me?”
He sighs, rubbing a hand over his face. “Renzo has agreed that Gazzago can take you as collateral until the marriage. He says Gazzago is owed, and he’ll take you to his place, but won’t marry you until an acceptable mourning period has passed.”
“No!” I scream, jumping up onto my knees. “No fucking way, Luca! I won’t do it!”
Luca grabs my hands, his eyes intense. “I will not let that happen. You have to trust me.”
I stare at Luca, his words echoing in my head. “But what can you do?”
His eyes hold mine, his expression unwavering. “I can marry you.”
I’m speechless. I search those emerald eyes, so mysterious and sincere, looking for any hint of hesitation, any doubt. “But Luca… I mean… we’ve just started. We can’t get married. Your brother will kill you.”
“He may try,” Luca says, his voice full of determination, “but I think he’ll find it much harder than he thinks. I will not let you be married off to that pathetic old man. I refuse. We will marry, and then you’ll never have to worry about it again.”
My chest tightens, my mind spinning with the weight of his words. “But Luca, how can we just go and get married like this? You barely know me. Why would you do that for me?”
Luca’s gaze softens, and he reaches out, brushing his fingers across my cheek. “I told you there were consequences to being in my bed. This is one of them. You are mine, but I am also yours. I will not let you suffer.”
I shake my head, a mix of fear and something else—something that feels suspiciously like hope—rising in me. “I can’t let you sacrifice yourself like that. I don’t want to be the cause of strife in your family. There has to be another way. I’d rather marry Gazzago than let you sacrifice yourself for me.”
The room seems to darken as Luca’s eyes blaze with fury. “You will not!” His voice is thunderous, his anger like a storm about to break.
I flinch, my pulse racing. But a new understanding dawns on me. “Luca? What is it? What aren’t you telling me?”
He sighs, rubbing a hand over his face. His shoulders sag, and for the first time, he looks almost weary. “Many years ago, I knew a girl,” he begins, his voice softer now, seeming to be. filled with recalled pain. “Her name was Vittoria—Vittoria Sartorre. Back then, girls were expected to be women by the time they were in their mid-teens. Not unlike what you’re describing now—there were expectations, but there were no other choices. Not really.”
He pauses, his gaze growing distant, as if he’s looking back through the years. “Vittoria and I were friends. Not lovers—I was still figuring out what being a vampire meant, still struggling to keep my secret. Vittoria was like a little sister to me. She had this way of laughing at me, of calling me out when I was being an ass. Most wouldn’t dare, but she did. My family had power back then, and I was treated differently, like I could do no wrong. But Vittoria… she never let me get away with anything. That’s why I liked her, I suppose.”
He swallows, his Adam's apple bobbing, and his eyes glisten with unshed tears. “She had the biggest blue eyes, full of innocence and hope. They sparkled when she laughed.” He shakes his head, his expression tightening. “Her parents arranged for her to marry an older man—a powerful, well-respected man. They thought they were doing the best they could for her. But I knew… I knew something was off about him. There were rumors, whispers of what he was capable of. But he was a powerful nobleman, and no one would come out and say anything openly.”
His voice catches, and he looks away, his jaw clenched. “Vittoria wasn’t happy. She begged me to help her. She’d heard the same things others had, and she was frightened. But I was, for all intents and purposes, in my early twenties, though in reality, I was over a hundred years old. I couldn’t tell anyone that, and I didn’t have the power to stop the match myself.”
He pauses, and I see a flicker of regret in his eyes. “I tried to get my father to intervene, to convince her family it was a bad match. But he said the affairs of her family weren’t our concern. He told me the only way to save her was to marry her myself. I remember balking at the idea. As a young vampire, I couldn’t imagine tying myself to a human. I was still learning the best ways to survive, still figuring out what it meant to be one of us. How could I do that if I had Vittoria following me around, slowing me down? The world was mine for the taking—I didn’t want a wife holding me back.”
He shakes his head, his eyes haunted. “Vittoria begged me to run away with her, to marry her so she could live her life freely. But I refused. I just… I couldn’t see how it would work. Who I was back then is not who I am now.” His green gaze lifts to mine then drops away, back into the past her was reliving.
He takes a deep breath, his voice lowering to almost a whisper. “The image of Vittoria’s face at her wedding is seared into my memory. Her smile was brittle, her eyes shadowed with fear, though she tried to hide it. She told me she’d made peace with it, that I shouldn’t worry about her. She got married, and they went on a honeymoon—two months traveling across Europe. It was what people did back then.”
Luca’s eyes turn hollow, the weight of old guilt pressing down on him. “I wished her well, moved on, and tried not to think of her until I ran into her a year later. She wasn’t the same. Her spirit was broken, her light snuffed out. She was bitter, angry. She blamed me for what had happened to her. Her husband had beaten her. She’d already lost a child.” His voice cracks. “I felt horrible, but I was powerless. I could’ve killed her husband, but he was an important man, and his death would’ve led to an investigation. Killing him to save her would have been too risky. I wasn’t experienced enough to get away with murdering someone like him. I never saw her again. I heard that she ran away, but others said she died.”
The pain in Luca’s voice is palpable, raw. His eyes meet mine, and I see his guilt, his regret. “And you feel guilty,” I whisper, my heart sinking. “You could’ve saved her, but you didn’t.”
He doesn’t respond, but the look in his eyes says enough. I feel my chest tighten painfully, my throat constricting with the idea that I could be consigned to the same fate as Vittoria. I had been so hopeful—hopeful that Luca wanted to marry me because he wanted me, because I meant something to him. But now I see it—he’s marrying me because he feels guilty, about being unable to save Vittoria. He doesn’t want to make the same mistake twice.
Realization churns in my stomach and I feel ill. Tears prick at my eyes and I bite my lip hard, trying to keep them from falling. This isn’t what I wanted. This isn’t the reason I wanted him to want me. I look away, my heart heavy with disappointment. I am not going to be a stand-in for a problem he couldn’t fix years ago. I’d rather run than be another human he’s saddled with until I die. It would bring a whole new meaning to a fate worse than death.
CHAPTER 20
Ipull into my loft and park, the engine cuts off, leaving us in a silence that feels heavier than it should. Pippa has been quiet the entire drive back from the beach, her face unreadable as she stares out the window. Her silence gnaws at me, like a splinter lodged just beneath the skin.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" she asks, breaking her silence as she turns to me, her eyes deep wells of worry.
