Page 57 of Breaking
After a while, Lilly whispered, "Don't think I mean this absolves us for our bad behaviour because we are adults and you both have taught us right from wrong, but I think subconsciously we took our cue from you."
Troy frowned. "What do you mean?"
"You never defended her," Max said, his voice edged with frustration. "Whenever Grandma said those things-about Mom marrying you for money, about how she wasn't good enough-you never stopped her. You never agreed outright, but you didn't shut it down either. And we assumed you felt the same way. Grandma always made it sound like you and Lila were in star-crossed lovers and mom got in the way."
Troy's stomach twisted. He had never truly considered how his silence had shaped their perception of Jenna. "That's on me," he admitted. "I should have spoken up. I should have been better. Lila and I were never together. There is something else."
Troy seemed to gather himself.
“A few years ago, your mom fell pregnant. It wasn’t planned. And I…I don’t do well with surprises. She had a miscarriage by the time I had adapted to the idea. And she just fell into this state where she couldn’t get out of bed in the morning. And I wasn’t there for her. She had to pick herself up.”
Another pause. Then Max muttered, "Mom always supported us. She was always there." He let out a small, bitter laugh. "It took her leaving for me to realize just how much."
Lilly nodded, swiping at her tears. "She encouraged my art more than anyone. It's a shame she never used hers for more than just... painting for herself."
Troy sighed, guilt gnawing at him. "That's my fault too. She mentioned going back to school when you were a baby, Max. But she never felt comfortable leaving you with Margaret-she knew how your grandmother would be about it. She didn't want to lose you both to her, I guess. She did not want you both raised by nannies. And I don't think she ever regretted that. You three were so tight, always in the kitchen baking or in her studio." His gaze swept the mantle with the little porcelain cats and onto the garden. There was a small smile in his words "I loved it when she was pregnant. I felt closest to her then. And when she got pregnant with Lilly, I was over the moon. But I knew I was keeping her from something too."
Lilly shook her head. "It wasn't just you, Dad. We played our part too."
Max's voice was firm. "But you were the main offender."
Troy let out a dry chuckle. "Yeah. I was." He rubbed his face, steeling himself for what came next. "I need to make things right. I love her very much and I owe her for supporting through everything. And the first step is getting professional help-figuring out what I need to work on and how to be better. I'm not giving up on this."
They both stared at him.
Finally, Max nodded. "Okay."
Lilly wiped at her eyes and sniffed. "Okay."
Troy took a breath, then shifted in his seat. "Before you go... there's one more thing."
Max raised an eyebrow.
"Lila was never anything more than an employee," Troy said, his tone flat. "And you should know what's been going on. It's been... a mess."
He kept it brief. The details were humiliating, but they needed to know the truth.
By the time he finished, both Max and Lilly looked stunned. Then, after a long silence, Lilly let out a breath. "That actually makes sense."
Max rubbed his temples. "Jesus, Dad."
"Yeah," Troy said, his voice wry.
Another silence stretched between them, but it felt different now-less like a chasm, more like a bridge waiting to be built.
Lilly sniffled again. "I want to try harder. For Mom. For us."
Max nodded. "Yeah. Me too."
Troy exhaled, something inside him loosening just a little. "Good." He glanced at the clock. "I am going out to your grandmas for a bit. Do you want to come along?"
Both nodded right away.
And for the first time in a long while, Troy felt like maybe-just maybe-there was a chance to put things right little by little.
Chapter 47
Troy
