Page 4 of Leo
“Hey, Nice Buns,” the bored-sounding voice sighed.“This is Nausicaa.What can I do for you?”
“Nausicaa?”
“Yeah, so?”
“Okay,” I drawled out.“Is Mr.Jennings in this morning?I seem to have a mistaken delivery and I need to get it sorted out.”
Nausicaa (who names their child Nausicaa?) sighed.“Okay, is it a delivery you’re expecting, or it was mistakenly delivered to you?”
“Mistakenly delivered to me.”
She sighed again.“You the funeral home?”
“I’m Leo Morris.”
Nausicaa grunted.“You’re, like, one of two deliveries we had on the schedule today,” she said, the sound of paper shuffling on her end of the line, then keys clicking.“Ira marked the delivery as completed so that means you accepted it.”
“What?No!I didn’t accept it!He said he had to go!”
“And did he leave the cupcakes with you?”she asked slowly, like I was a very overwrought child she was trying to make see reason.
“Yes, but—”
“Then you accepted it.”
“I don’t think that’s how it works.Look, please let me speak with Mr.Jennings.”
She huffed.“How do you know I’m not the one in charge of deliveries, huh?Is it because I’m a girl?Or is it because I’m so young?Maybe you’re just being sexist and ageist.Did you ever think of that?”
“What?”
“Look, I’ll tell Ambrose you called, okay?Bye.”
The line, unsurprisingly, went dead.
Edward came back in from the bathroom, looking very damp and very pleased with life.“That is the best frosting.Even better than Aunt Gnome’s.She thinks I don’t notice she uses whipped cream instead of actual frosting, but I do.Even with sprinkles, it’s not as good as that stuff.Can I have another?I mean, Ms.Dennis isn’t going to care if we eat them, right?”
The joys of raising a kid around a funeral home—a very pragmatic view of death.“Ms.Dennis likely wouldn’t even care if she wasn’t dead, but no, no more cupcakes this morning, kiddo.Where’s your other shoe?We need to run take those cupcakes back into town.There’s been a mistake.”
CHAPTER2
AMBROSE
“I’mnotcalling you Nausicaa.”
Bethany’s eyeroll was practically audible.“Why not?It’s much cooler thanBethany.Bethanysounds like some eighties cheerleader who spends every Saturday night after the big game making out with her boyfriend Steve under the bleachers, but she won’t let him get past first base because she’s waiting for marriage or something.”She flopped sideways in the single chair in my office other than my way too expensive desk chair.Propping her crepe soled creepers up on the wall, she let one arm drape dramatically to the floor while flinging the other over her eyes.
She’d obviously taken and acedDramatic Teenager 101over summer break without me knowing.Probably right after that poetry workshop at the rec center, but before theNonfiction for Fiction Aficionadosthing at the library.
“Okay then.”I sighed, making sure I hit save on the bakery budget spreadsheet before sitting back in my chair.“Nausicaa as in the princess from the post-apocalyptic enviropunk anime, or Nausicaa as in the character inThe Odysseywho helped Odysseus get ships to return home and had a deep and unrequited love for him and wanted to marry him?”
She scowled, the annoyed twist of her lips and dip of her chin the only thing visible under her upraised arm.“The second one, I guess.”She let her arm fall and glared at me harder.“Why does it have to be either?What if I just really like the name and think it’s much cooler thanBethany?”
Because our parents picked Bethany for you, and I remember sitting on the floor while they pored over baby name books.I remember when Mom decided Bethany was perfect for you.And I remember calling you Bethany before you were born, talking to Mom’s belly and saying I was going to be the best big brother.
“If you want me to call you that,” I said, keeping my tone neutral as possible, “okay.Nausicaa it is.Let me know and I can notify the school to change it on your records.”
She sat up, swinging her feet to the floor with a thump.“I need to give it a test-drive first,” she said.“See if it works in the real world.”
