Page 56 of Love Arranged
I deserve her anger and worse, so I take it without interrupting, even when it kills me to see the pain in her eyes.
“We spent two months talking, Lorenzo. Two months of you being the first person I texted in the morning, and two months of you being the last person I spoke to before I went to sleep. It was nearly impossible to get you to share anything personal, but when you did—like that story about when your uncle broke your nose—it felt like we were finally getting somewhere.”
She holds my stare and forces me to look into her glassy eyes. “During that time, I thought what we had was unique. That it wasreal.” Her voice doesn’t waver, doesn’t so much as crack while she bares her heart to me once again.
A heart I took for granted, and a heart someone else will show better appreciation for one day.
The idea sends an ache through my chest, strong enough to bleed the air from my lungs.
She points at herself. “I was honest about what I wanted, and you made me believe you were looking for the same. You made me wish for more, and then you took that hope and destroyed it like I didn’t matter. So no, I don’t believe you liked me too much. On the contrary, I don’t think you like meenough.”
I can’t let her continue with that narrative, so I reveal a secret I’ve kept hidden in the darkest depth of my mind, never meant to be uncovered.
Until now.
“I wasn’t looking for anything real when I joined the app, but meeting you made me consider it.”
Her eyes widen.
I continue before my anxiety talks me out of it. “I’d never expect you to forgive me for what I did, and I hope you don’t because I don’t deserve it. But Iamsorry for how I treated you after we met, and I’m sorry for leading you on before that. I had every intention of ending things after you told me about your thirty-year plan, but then I made up excuses for why I wasn’t ready to let you go. Reasons like I was bored or entertained or lonely.
“I wanted you to tell me why you loved bees enough to create a garden for them or what made you want to buy a cottage versus some big house. I wanted to knowyou, and in the process I realized I could never ask you to play the part of my fake fiancée. You deserved someone who could give you that thirty-year plan, and he wasn’tme.”
She glances away, the sheen in her eyes visible from the light above us.
After a few breaths, she says, “Okay.”
I take a step back. “Okay?”
She nods. “Now tell me why you’re acting like we’re friends in front of everyone.”
“It’s stupid.” I scrub a hand down my face. “And I won’t do it again.”
Ican’t. I’ll figure out a different way to boost the public’s opinion of me without dragging Lily into it.
She crosses her arms. “That’s not an explanation, Lorenzo.”
I have no choice but to answer her, even if it makes melook like an ass. “I was seeing if you helped improve my image. I’m falling behind in the polls, and if I don’t fix it, I’ll lose the election.”
It’s a bitter pill to swallow after spending two years planning my revenge for my parents’ deaths, but I’m willing to drink poison if it means saving my campaign.
She takes a step back, as if to distance herself from my words. “And how am I supposed to do that?”
“Everyone in town likes you. All it took was one public sighting of me holding your hair back and a focus group is already using it as an example of why I’m not so bad, so I wanted to test out a theory and see whether hanging around you has a positive effect on my reputation.”
She blinks once. Twice. Three times, and I still have no response.
“What do you think?” I ask.
“You want my honest opinion?”
“Do your worst.”
“That’s a terrible idea. I’m sorry, but there’s no way it’ll work, and even if it did have some impact on your polling numbers, they wouldn’t be long-lasting.”
“Are you a political expert now?”
Her laugh puts me on edge. “Not at all, but I’ve spent my whole life here, so I know a thing or two about the people.”
