Page 34 of Stocking Stuffers
“I’m fine,” he said, wishing it were true.
“Sure you are.” The sarcasm pitched Karen’s voice deeper. “Does this have to do with Ms. Sasha Holiday?”
He shrugged and tried to put on a relaxed smile. “I’m fine. Promise. I barely know Sasha.”
“Sometimes we just know that it’s special. I’d never been with a woman until I met Andie.”
“Really?”
“I was with Devon for over twenty years, and I miss him every day, especially this time of year.” Perry nodded, recognizing the name of Karen’s late husband. She smiled. “When I met Andie, I knew immediately that we were meant to be, that we would be incredible together, but I was scared and mourning. So I moved slow. And she let me. She let me take my time, get my bearings. I’m so thankful for that.”
“That’s a beautiful story.”
“Do you get what I’m trying to tell you, hon?”
“Not exactly.” He tugged on his hair, trying to wake himself up.
“Sasha lit up like a Christmas tree when you first walked in the other night. She can’t keep her eyes off you. And you’re the same. Maybe it’s only sex. Maybe it’s attraction that will fizzle out. But I think it’s more, and I’m pretty fucking smart.”
Perry’s stomach clenched. “I wish it was more, but she doesn’t want that.”
“And I’m saying, let her be scared. Give her time to get her bearings. Give her space to figure it out. Maybe she won’t come to her senses, but maybe she will.”
“I don’t want to get hurt.”
“Oh, sweetheart, I don’t want that for you, either.” Karen reached over and squeezed his knee. “Sometimes love is a risk. The best kind of risk, and you deserve all the love.”
He smiled at her as a sudden jingle of bells sounded behind them. He turned in his chair to see Sasha, wearing her reindeer antlers again, walking out of the room.
* * *
I don’t wantto get hurt.
I don’t want to get hurt.
Those words rang through Sasha’s ears through dinner. She’d donned the stupid-ass reindeer antlers and a Christmas sweatshirt from Valerie in the hopes that a little cheer would do her some good. She’d fake it to make it and all that crap.
After the talk with Ryker earlier, she’d decided it was worth it to pull on false merriness like an ill-fitting Santa costume this evening. She only needed to make it through a few more hours of cozy Christmas social time, then she was home free come morning.
And yeah, the thought of leaving tomorrow left her breathless and hurting, a physical ache from her ribs to the pit of her stomach. She’d never see Andie and Karen, who were the biggest troublemakers ever. Never see Louise, who was sweet and shy, or Valerie, who could so easily become a friend.
And she’d never see Perry Winters.
She kept trying to convince herself that they could somehow continue this no-strings affair, that it didn’t mean anything and they were on the same page, so it was okay to keep seeing each other once the storm passed. But she couldn’t lie anymore.
I don’t want to get hurt.
She didn’t want to hurt him. Their goals, their hopes were too incompatible. He deserved a woman who would cuddle up to him while roasting chestnuts in the fire or who would help him trim the million Christmas trees in this adorable bed and breakfast.
He deserved a partner who would happily dance with him at the Winterberry Sappy Christmas Twosomes’ Extravaganza or whatever it was called. And that would never be her.
She was almost sure it could never be her.
“More butternut squash soup, Sasha?” Valerie asked her, snapping her out of it. “Or maybe chili?”
“I’ll try the chili. The butternut squash was amazing, though.” Everything Valerie had fed her had been exceptional. No wonder this place was so successful.
It tasted of home.
