Page 6 of Big Balls
I root around and grab my purse, then dig inside and find a sticky note.
I pull it out and contort my arm around to get it within her reach.
“What’s this for?” She eyes me a little bit skeptically, but I would too, if I was her.
“Do you see that little black dot behind you? If you put the paper over the dot, it will keep the toilet from flushing until you take it off.”
Her eyes narrow as she eyes me, the sticky note, and the flush sensor. It’s actually kind of cute watching her make this little suspicious face, because her father gave me that very same look not even five minutes ago.
“Try it, at least. It’s worked for me before.” I try to keep my voice soothing and calm, hoping not to get her worked up any more than she already is.
“Fine,” she says, drawing the word out into approximately eighteen syllables of pure skepticism. Then she starts humming to herself as she wriggles around to complete the task of placing the sticky note over the black dot on the back.
What exactly is that song she’s humming? It sounds so familiar.
Then I place it. It’s that one song that always gets played at every stadium on earth. Gary Glitter’s “Rock and Roll Part 2.” You can’t go to a single sporting event in America without hearing it at least once. I heard it at every single one of my brothers’ games, and at every game we’ve ever watched together. I didn’t even know it had a real name until recently. I thought it was just “that sports song.”
“Dunh dunh dunhhh da da. Da da.” Her feet plop to the ground just scant inches away from my face.
“See? It worked. Now how about I get up, and you can unlock the door so I can help you with the flushing part.”
She hums a little more of the stadium crowd pleaser, and I can’t help but chime in with a “hey” the way the song demands.
Katy bursts into a full-on belly laugh, and the door unlocks.
I smile at her, and then offer up my hand for a high five. “Good work on the mission, super spy.”
Her eyes light up. “Thank you. I’m doing a great job, right?”
I nod. “Go ahead and finish cleaning up and when you’re done washing your hands, I’ll get the noisy part handled.”
She skips off to the sinks, and I wait until she’s done. “Okay, cover your ears, Katydid.” Then I lean forward and grab the scrap of paper off the toilet’s sensor. It flushes the way it’s supposed to, and I congratulate myself on a job well done.
When the noise abates, she looks at me with another of those suspicious, narrow-eyed glimpses. “Did you say you’re a friend of my Daddy?”
I nod as I reach forward to wash my hands. Because gross. So many germs everywhere in a public bathroom. Even rich people have germs. “That’s right. He asked me to come check on you.”
She tilts her head up at me, then shakes her finger in my face. “It’s not nice to tell lies.”
I frown for a minute. “I’m not. He was standing outside and feeling worried, so he sent me in here to make sure you were okay.”
She shakes her head. “My Daddy doesn’t have any friends that are girls.”
I pause, my face heating. “Well, then, maybe he felt like I was a safe grown-up to help you. We’re doing okay here, right?”
She nods. “But he could have sent Uncle Tate instead. Uncle Tate is my favorite.”
I spin through my mental list of information about Ethan Alexander’s family, but can’t come up with anything beyond the little girl in front of me and his late wife.
I shrug it off. It’s none of my business anyway. “Well, I don’t think Uncle Tate was the right person to send into the ladies’ room. Besides, we did a great job, just the two of us.”
Katy gives me a little tiny smile, then abruptly squashes me around my mid-section in an enthusiastic hug. “Thank you,” she says.
I smile at her. “You have such nice manners. Your Daddy must be very proud of you.” I point toward the door. “Shall we go check in with him, superspy Katy?”
She takes my hand and hauls me out into the hallway, where the sharp edges of Ethan Alexander’s gaze are enough to flay the skin off my bones.
I offer up another awkward fingertip wave. “Hi,” I murmur. “Here’s Katy, and she’s doing fine.”
